


Christmas Special with the Winchesters

by DJ_Greg



Series: Lovers' Leap [1]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Abusive Relationships (Past), Alpha Benny Lafitte, Alpha Ellen Harvelle, Alpha John Winchester, Alpha Sam Winchester, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe, Angst with a Happy Ending, Beta Lenore, Beta Rufus Turner, Caring John Winchester, Celebrities, Celebrity Crush, Celebrity Dean Winchester, Celebrity John Winchester, Celebrity Sam Winchester, Christmas Special, Developing Relationship, Explicit Language, Family Drama, Family Issues, Flirting, Fluff, Hunters & Hunting, Hurt Benny Lafitte, Hurt Dean Winchester, M/M, Nice John Winchester, Omega Becky Rosen, Omega Dean Winchester, Omega Jessica Moore, Park Ranger Benny Lafitte, Pinning Benny Lafitte, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-30
Updated: 2018-12-21
Packaged: 2019-08-17 14:00:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 38,334
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16517825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DJ_Greg/pseuds/DJ_Greg
Summary: "Alpha vs. Wilderness" was a hugely popular hunting show, hosted by Alpha John Winchester and his two sons. When John announces a contest in which three fans can win a spot on Christmas episode and join the Winchesters for six days to film it in their mountain house, the network is flooded with milions of replies.A lonely park ranger, Alpha Benny Lafitte, never expected to get in. And while being part of the show he loved was a fantastic opportunity on its own, what he truly looked forward to was meeting one of the co-host, Dean Winchester, a spitfire Omega and everything he wanted in a mate.But there was no chance Dean would fell for him. Such things happen only in romantic comedies, right?





	1. Lonely Alpha

**Author's Note:**

> I'm very happy to finally start posting this story. I've been working on it since May in between writing "Road to Salvation" and it doubled in length from originally estimated 20 thousand words. The fic is fully finished, so I'll be posting a new chapter each Monday and Friday until 21st of December. Hopefully, you'll enjoy it.
> 
> This fic was edited by my new Beta, MrsDeanWinchester87. Big thanks for her help, especially on such short notice!
> 
> I plan to write more Christmas stories in the future, but considering how out of hand this one got, they'll definitely be a lot shorter.

It was that enchanting time of the evening when sun had disappeared behind the horizon and only the faint afterglow still remained on the darkening sky. The time when the body slowly starts relaxing and readying for sleep but before it becomes too sluggish to move. Easily Benny’s favorite moment of the day.

He stood on the front porch of the Park Ranger’s cabin, leaning against a wooden column, taking in the gorgeous view. Tall pine trees surrounded him from every direction and high on their tops birds gave out their final cries, preparing for nightly rest. Although he wasn’t able to see them in dim lighting, his sharp smell and hearing allowed him to occasionally spot one carelessly moving around. He lazily followed their travels while enjoying a lungful of fresh air. The twilight air was full of various scents he’s grown familiar with over the years: bark, pine, the earthy aroma of the ground and pheromones from various animals he didn’t bother to name right now.

From a few steps away came a steady ticking of his truck’s engine as it cooled down in chilly night air. Another fulfilling day of supervising Lover’s Leap State Park had ended and with a satisfied smile, Benny turned around, away from the beautiful forest, to enter the Ranger’s Cabin.

“Welcome back,” Lenore greeted the moment he stepped in, looking up from the papers she was working on. Probably a daily report about number of visits. “Is everything alright?”

“Yeah,” Benny assured as he put the toolbox he carried inside a storage room. “I fixed that sign along the main road. Some teens must’ve kicked it down, there were empty beer cans nearby. Probably tried to impress each other.”

Lenore shook her head and the salty aroma of irritation spoiled her natural herbal Beta scent. Mischievous teenagers were the bane of their existence. No matter how many they caught, or how many fines they wrote out, it hardly changed anything. Knocked-down signs, meadows covered in trash, and disturbing other visitors continued.

But Benny didn’t want to think about that, didn’t want to ruin his good mood when he was about to kick back in front of a TV.

“I’ll write a report later—“

“Don’t worry about,” Lenore cut him off. “You’ve got till Monday. I wouldn’t want to keep you from watching your __favorite__  show,” she teased with a knowing, gentle smile dancing on her lips.

Benny averted his eyes, painfully aware of the red-tinged embarrassment erupting hot across his face and down his neck. To anyone else, Lenore’s words might have sounded innocent, but they both knew what she really meant.

With a quick nod, Benny exited the reception and ventured down the long hallway to the bunkroom. It was decently sized and furnished with classic, slightly worn-out household items. An old-style TV, a recliner covered in floral upholstery that you could find at an old lady’s home, and a mini bar all adorned the musty bunkroom, giving it very homey feeling. This is where Benny enjoyed spending time the most during his weekends. Other rangers saw weekend shifts as a curse and gladly allowed Benny to consistently take them, even if they couldn’t understand why he wanted them in the first place. Most of the other rangers preferred spending those two days with their families and as far away from work as possible.

That wasn’t a problem for Benny though. Weekends at the Ranger’s cabin were always quiet. His only job was to respond to emergencies, which had only ever occurred __twice__  in his seven years on duty. For the most part he could kick back on the front porch and relax with a good novel or wander around the forest when mood struck, making sure to stay close to the building.

But that wasn’t the main reason why he insisted on taking weekend shifts.

See, his cabin didn’t have a TV; the shitty signal couldn’t reach his cabin as far in as it was. And that meant Benny’s only option for catching new episodes of his favorite show – airing on Saturday evenings – was in Ranger’s cabin which as fully equipped with all the electronic gadgets and means of communication.

Benny glanced at the clock hanging above the bunkroom’s door and cursed under his breath. He rushed to sit down on the recliner and quickly turned on the TV.

Thankfully, the intro to “ _ _Alpha vs. Wilderness__ ” had just started. He missed the opening narration, but that wasn’t a big loss; it only recapped the host’s – John Winchester – long history as a professional hunter. It was something he’d seen countless times before. Benny sighed with relief, unbuttoned the top of ranger’s shirt and stretched out his legs.

“ _ _Alpha vs. Wilderness__ ” was a continuous hit for the past fourteen seasons. It grew from a summer filler, which received little to no advertising, to the network’s cash cow that drew millions of viewers in weekly. Alpha John Winchester was an experienced hunter who traveler around the world for the past twenty-four years. He brought his two sons – who had eventually became co-hosts – along on every hunt. The show was fast-paced, filled with action, humor and exotic locations. Perfect entertainment in Benny’s opinion.

However, none of the above was the reason why he refused to miss a single episode.

No, that would be because of John Winchester’s oldest son, Dean.

Benny’s heart sped up when the stunning Omega appeared on the screen wearing a worn out leather jacket and his usual, cheeky smile that made those plush lips even more tempting. A smile that lit Dean’s entire face up as he teased his younger brother for the amount of research he conducted about the alligators in the Great Dismal Swamp in Virginia. “ _ _Come on, Sammy, don’t be such a nerd.__ ” Dean’s deep voice sounded like a calm song in Benny’s ears. “ _ _As if you never hunted for alligators before__.” In response Sam Winchester drew his lips in tight line and started explaining why he researched every time. But Benny didn’t pay attention to Sam’s words, too absorbed by Dean.

Tall, muscular and outgoing, Dean was nothing like your average Omega. Most Omegas – male or female – preferred to mate while in their early twenties and focus on raising pups, taking care of home and their Alpha’s needs. Dean was not only unattached- despite nearing thirtieth birthday- but he was also known for solely dating female Betas and Omegas. The majority of Dean’s public photos taken by paparazzi featured him with an array of attractive women – a new one every week or two. Some of those women went online to detail their short flings with Dean and they all agreed that although Dean had a small cock, like most male Omegas tend to, he was living proof that size doesn’t matter.

Once a reporter asked Dean why he never dated an Alpha. Dean explained: “ _ _Alphas like to tell people what to do, it’s in their nature, and I’m a very dominant person myself. If I ever mated with an Alpha, we’d probably end up killing each other. No, I’d rather avoid that pitfall.__ ”

Those words pierced Benny’s heart like an arrow, crushing any hope he had at ever hooking up with the wonderful Omega.

__Doesn’t matter. Even if he was open to dating Alpha, he wouldn’t bother with such failure like you. You couldn’t even keep Andrea satisfied enough to keep her from running away with another guy._ _

Benny rubbed the palms of his hands against his face, willing the negative thoughts to go away, but they remained at the back of his mind, threatening to resurface when he least expected it. There was only one way to silence them. He got up, went to the mini-bar and fished out a new bottle of Jack Beam Black, which he bought a week ago and smuggled inside the cabin despite the fact that rangers are forbidden to bring or drink alcohol on the premises. At this moment he couldn’t care less about getting caught by Lenore, he needed a drink. It wasn’t like Lenore would say anything to their superiors if she noticed anyway. She’d just make the same sad expression she wore whenever she saw her friend still mourning over Andrea.

He quickly poured a double of the amber liquid into a glass and downed it in one gulp, enjoying the faint taste of brown sugar, honey, caramel, and butterscotch that seared his throat slithering down into his core. The sneering thoughts and pain in his heart slowly slipped away, becoming subdued. Good. If he can’t get rid of them any other way, he’ll drown them in alcohol. It worked wonders for him thus far, ever since the night when Andrea announced that she was leaving him for another man.

No, that wasn’t the correct way to put it. She didn’t __announce__  it. She simply told Benny that she wanted to end their relationship and he, like a complete fool that he is, pressed the issue, begging her to reconsider, promising to try harder to meet her expectations in the future, until she had no choice but to admit that there was another man.

A man who didn’t have to __‘try harder in the future’__ , but already did in the present. A __real__  Alpha.

That evening Benny decided that alcohol was the best cure for broken heart, much like right now. That night he ventured to a near-by bar where he spent hours nursing a bottle of whisky and feeling sorry for himself. At first, he was furious at Andrea for backstabbing him, then with the other man for seducing her. In the end, he understood that __he__  was the only one to blame. __He__  failed to be a good Alpha, __he__  wasn’t able to keep Andrea happy and pushed her into another Alpha’s arms.

He didn’t deserve to mate with an Omega.

Leaning back in the recliner, Benny, feeling completely at peace with the idea that the stunning Omega will never be his, sunk deeper into the pleasant combination of numbness and warmth caused by the whisky. It successfully numbed everything… except Dean Winchester’s gorgeous face and deep voice. Benny watched him skillfully sidestep an alligator’s attacks. Years of experience showing in those movements. Dean was brave, tough and unique. He deserved someone who’ll make him happy, someone better than Benny.

When the hunt was finished and the Winchesters celebrated another victory, Benny downed his glass and capped the nearly empty decanter. He should probably get up and put it away, but he felt too relaxed to move. Maybe he’ll take a short nap in the recliner…?

Someone’s voice was pushing on the whisky-induced haze that surrounded his mind, sounding like little more than a whisper. Benny focused his eyes on the TV where it seemed to be coming from as John Winchester spoke directly into the camera: __“…an enormous success in past fourteen years and we wouldn’t be able to do it without your support. That’s why this year we’ve decided to give a special reward to three of you. As you might know, every Christmas me and my boys go to Connecticut to spend holidays together. We catch our food, cook meals, exchange gifts and stories… For those three days we’re simply a family and it’s a very special time for all of us, because… family is everything.__ ”

John Winchester paused. Even in his current state, Benny could clearly see the affection the older Alpha felt for his two sons, affection that lit his entire face and briefly made it impossible for him to speak.

Benny remembers the tragic story of why John Winchester became a professional hunter. Twenty-two years ago, John was a car mechanic, leading an average life in Kansas with his mate and two sons, earning just enough money to provide a simple, but comfortable life for them. One night a broken electrical outlet started a fire that consumed their entire house. John’s mate, Mary Winchester, was rushed to the hospital with serious burns and smoke inhalation. Despite doctors’ best efforts, she died two days later.

While that was heartbreaking on its own, what truly pushed John to become a wanderer was the reaction of Mary’s parents. They always disliked John and blamed him for failing to protect their daughter. They took the alpha to the court, claiming he was an unfit father for Dean and Sam. When it became clear the judge indented to grant Mary’s parents full custody, John packed up their remaining belongings and flew out of the country with his pups. It was no wonder that spending Christmas together meant so much to the Alpha.

“ _ _This year we’ve decided to celebrate that special time with our fans,__ ” John continued, “ _ _and so, for the first time in show’s history, we’re going to shoot a Christmas Special. We’ll show a hunt for a deer, dinner preparations and various traditions like carol singing. And that’s where__  you,” John pointed a finger straight into the camera for emphasis, “ _ _come in. Each of you can send us a letter or an email explaining why you’re a fan of the show and why you’d like to meet us. From all application, we’ll chose__  three __fans to join us during the filming of Christmas Special. You’ll stay for six days in our cottage in Connecticut…__ ”

John Winchester kept going, but Benny couldn’t hear him anymore, excitement pounded in his heart, drowning the older Alpha’s words out.

This was an opportunity of a lifetime! Benny spent the last three years admiring Dean Winchester from afar, telling himself that he was at peace with the idea of never dating the gorgeous Omega. But there was a small ache in his heart exposing that lie for what it was. He would never be fully okay with it, because Dean was __everything__  he ever wanted in a mate and he didn’t believe he would ever find anyone nearly as amazing as this omega. Not even Andrea, as wonderful as she was, could match Dean’s merits.

 _ _Andrea__.

Those thoughts he fought so hard to drown out had reared their ugly head again. He failed to make Andrea happy… Why would he succeed with Dean?

“You should apply,” a warm voice snapped him out of his thoughts.

Benny jerked his head toward the half-opened door where someone was standing and watching him. It took a second before his blurry vision sharpened enough for him to recognize Lenore, now dressed in casual clothes and with a bag hanging over her shoulder.

“It would do you a lot of good if you met with Dean,” Lenore continued. “You could confront your image of him with reality and, who knows, maybe even start something more meaningful.”

A moment ago that was what Benny planned to do, but thankfully regained his sanity and remembered why it was an awful idea. “What for?” he responded, shrugging his shoulders. “So he’d eventually realize I’m not good for him and abandon me for someone better? No point in wasting his time like that.”

“Benny.” He hated the mournful way Lenore said his name. It reminded him how much of a failure he was and that they were both aware of it. “It’s not healthy for you to be sitting here and reminiscing about what happened. You have to move on—“

Of course she meant well, she always did. But right now Benny couldn’t listen to her, not when wounds in his chest were freshly torn and bleeding, Lenore’s every word feeling like a claw grating over them.

“That’s none of your business!” he snapped.

Lenore stopped talking and Benny refused to look in her direction, focusing his eyes on the screen even if he wasn’t actually paying attention to the commercial playing. The cheerful music and excited voices of actors praising the product provided a sharp contrast to the heavy silence filling the bunkroom. Benny fought the urge to speak first, to apologize for shouting when Lenore only tried to help. He was sick to death of everyone looking down on him, a useless Alpha who chased his Omega away. Why won’t people just let him live in peace instead of constantly reawakening the shame he felt?

“Right…” Lenore eventually said, her voice quieter. “I’ll see you on Monday then.”

She turned away, but paused for a few seconds longer as if she considered saying something else. Whatever it was, remained unspoken and she walked away. Soon after Benny heard the sound of front door opening and then closing.

With shaking hands, he unscrewed the bottle and poured the last of the whisky into his glass, leaning his head back against the headrest and keeping his eyes closed. Benny nursed the liquor trying to forget about the guilt of the way he treated his friend, about the painful break-up with Andrea that still haunted him, and about the contest he wanted to join.

None of it mattered. He was just a sad, defeated Alpha who couldn’t do anything right.

What was the point of trying to change it?

 

***

 

It was two months later, the beginning of November. It was another calm Saturday after Benny’s shift had ended. The alpha was grooming his beard when a phone in the reception started ringing. Benny glanced over his shoulder, surprised by the sound – in the years he spent working as a park ranger, the phone rarely rang. He dropped his scissors in the sink and rushed out of the bathroom, hastily drying his beard on the way to the front desk.

He picked up the receiver and started talking before it was even properly pressed against his ear: “Lover’s Leap State Park, Park Ranger’s Office. How can I help you?”

“Hello,” came an official-sounding response. “This is Ellen Harvelle, an executive producer of ‘ _ _Alpha vs. Wilderness__ ’ TV show. May I talk to Benjamin Lafitte?”

“S-speaking,” Benny faltered. Was he hearing it right?

“Good to hear you, Mr. Lafitte. I’m calling to announce that you’ve been selected as one of three winners of our contest and you’ll be joining us in December to shoot Christmas Special. Congratulations!”

The firm, but polite voice still resounded in Benny’s ear for a couple of seconds after she stopped talking and he stood there, frozen in place, staring out of the cabin’s front window. A drop of water hung dangerously from his half-trimmed beard, threatening to drop down if he doesn’t wipe it off.

Selected in the content? Joining them in December to shoot Christmas Special? It didn’t make any sense. No, he must’ve misunderstood what she was saying.

“Mr. Lafitte?”

The drop of water split away and landed on his bare chest, where it continued its slow descent downward.

“There must be some sorta mistake,” he finally managed. “I didn’t enter the content.”

A muffled shuffling of papers came from the other side, followed by Mrs. Harvelle’s confused voice as she read: “ _ _’Benjamin Lafitte, age 30, Alpha. I’ve worked as a Park Ranger in Lover’s Leap State Park for past seven years and I’ve always took weekend shifts my co-workers despise, specifically to catch new episodes of ‘__ Alpha vs. Wilderness _ _’, because I don’t own a TV at home. I’ve always loved nature and had interest in hunting, so John’s show deeply resonated with me. To me it’s not just a TV show I watch out of boredom. It offered me comfort in dark moments and allowed me to forget how lonely my life sometimes feels.’__  Is this correct?”

Everything she’s read was right, but the words sounded alien to him.

“Yes, but… I didn’t write it.”

“In that case you must have a good friend who made you a surprise,” Mrs. Harvelle concluded.

Benny closed his eyes and took a deep, calming breath.

 _ _Lenore__.

“Would you be interested in filming the Christmas Special with us even though you didn’t personally enter yourself?” Mrs. Harvelle asked warily.

He opened his mouth to say “no”, because __how dare__  Lenore apply in his name?! She probably thought she was very generous by setting him up to meet a guy he had a crush on for years…

But then he remembered about Dean.

That beautiful, tough as nails Omega who ventured around the world, hunting dangerous animals while wearing that stunning smile. So different from other Omegas Benny met throughout the years. He wanted so desperately to hold Dean in his arms and kiss him until they both run out of breath, then explore every inch of his body hardened by years of hard work.

And now he had a chance at fulfilling that dream. It wasn’t __what if__  anymore, but something that was happening __right now__. Was he seriously going to turn it away, because he was annoyed at Lenore for sticking her nose in his love life – not out of malice, but out of genuine concern?

He closed his eyes, letting his burning attraction for Dean and the bubbling anger at Lenore rage against one another. He didn’t know how long he stood there, waiting for a winner, but probably not that long, as Ms. Harvelle hadn’t interrupted him once to ask for an answer or offer to call back later. In the end it wasn’t a hard choice to make.

“Yes, I’m in.”

There was an audible relief in Mrs. Harvelle’s voice. “I’m glad to hear that. Welcome aboard, Mr. Lafitte. The shooting starts on Monday, December 10th and you need to be here on Sunday afternoon at the latest, so we can give you a crash course on how things are gonna work: shooting, what we expect from you, what’s not allowed. Very standard stuff. I’ll call you in a week to discuss a few more details. Is next Saturday alright?”

“Fine by me.”

“It was a pleasure, Mr. Laffite. I’ll talk to you soon.”

With a soft __click__  the line went dead and Benny slowly put the receiver down, his mind in desperate rush to digest what he’s just heard. In a month and a half he’d be seeing Dean Winchester in real life, and have a chance to win his affection, exactly as he dreamed for such a long time. And all thanks to…

A faint wave of anger once again resurfaced in his mind and Benny quickly dialed the familiar phone number, punching buttons with more force than necessary. He didn’t have to wait long for connection as Lenore picked up after only two signals “Hello?”

“I told you, my love life is none of your business!” Benny growled.

There was a pause, during which he squeezed the receiver hard enough to make the plastic crackle in protest in his white-knuckled grip.

“You were invited into the show?” Lenore deduced eventually.

“Yes,” Benny confirmed, his annoyance subduing a little at the sound of her careful tone. “Thanks to application __I__  didn’t send. After I __specifically__  told you to __leave it alone__.”

Lenore sighed on the other end. “I’m sorry for overstepping here. It’s just… what happened between you and Andrea—“

“I don’t want to talk about it!”

“I know and I understand,” she placated. “The problem is that you also don’t do __anything__  to deal with your emotions. You spend all of your free time at work or drinking and it’s clearly eating you from the inside. I’m worried of what’s going to happen to you.”

Somewhere in Benny’s chest a thread of shame awoke, causing him to wince. Lenore tried to help him since that night Andrea walked out of his life and he got wasted in a local bar. He wasn’t in a state to get up from a table without help, let alone return to his now empty home. So the barman borrowed the alpha’s cell and tried calling someone to collect him. Lenore was the only one to pick up. She walked in fifteen minutes later and saw the sad lump left of him thanks to hours of stubborn drinking. He was laying on the table, alcohol spilled all around him and slurring some words he didn’t recall later.

At least that was the lie he repeated to Lenore and himself. In reality he remembered quite a bit of what he said: pathetic apologies to Andrea for failing her and helpless promises to do better if she gave him another chance. Benny wasn’t sure Lenore believed his lie. Probably not, but she never brought it up.

Throughout those three years Lenore always offered a silent comfort and spent as much time with Benny as possible, allowing his tired mind some relief from constant longing. But he saw subtle signs: the more his thoughts became subdued, the bigger the pain grew in Lenore’s eyes. He didn’t understand it. He was slowly getting over the break-up in his own way, so why had Lenore looked at him like he was on a death row? Sad. Disappointed. Pity. Shouldn’t she be happy he was able to go through his days without a problem? Why had she felt the need to meddle in his life as if there was still a huge problem to resolve?

“You had no right,” Benny repeated, this time he’d run out of steam.

“Please, just enjoy your time on the set, alright?” Lenore’s voice was warm like a honey, slowly enveloping Benny’s heart in protective embrace. Under it the anger and shame he felt disappeared, leaving him tired. “Meet Dean, talk to him. Isn’t that what you wanted? I’m sure it’s going to be good for you.”

“Sure. I’ll do that.”

Afterward he cleaned the bathroom sink, deciding to leave trimming his beard for later, and he ventured to the bunkroom to fish a half-empty bottle of Jack Daniel’s from the mini-bar. Several glasses of the drink helped him slip into that pleasant numbness and let him focus on the prospect of meeting the beautiful Omega who frequently appeared in his sweetest dreams…


	2. Meeting Dean

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As promised, it's bright and early Monday morning and a new chapter. Enjoy!

Woodbury, Connecticut was one of those old-fashioned, small towns you could see on a postcard, looking very picturesque even in an afternoon sun with its two-story buildings, Christmas lights hanging from trees surrounding the marketplace, and all covered in a thick layer of fluffy snow. Benny took the beautiful view in as he drove through the main street, his pick-up truck jerking slightly on uneven surface. There were few people walking outside and Benny passed only two cars on his way. Such a peaceful, calm town. If he were ever to give up living in a forest, it would be for a place like this.

He wished he could stop and wander around, visit the street booths offering Christmas food and other items, but unfortunately this wasn’t his destination. Maybe he’ll return here tomorrow or in a couple of days, depending on how things go.

He drove past the last line of building in the town and entered the mountain road that spiraled between thick walls of trees, leading higher up the Southern Litchfield Hills toward the Winchesters’ cottage. Months ago during their second conversation Mrs. Harvelle offered to hire a driver who’d pick Benny up at his home and transport him to the set, then back once the filming was finished. But Benny declined since he lived so close. And besides, he enjoyed trips like this. The steady rumble of truck’s engine and the crunching of snow under its wheels were the only sounds that disturbed the peaceful atmosphere of the mountain. Moments like this allowed him a break from the emotional turmoil his life turned into three years ago.

Although, this could be the last time he needed it anyway.

 _ _No, don’t get your hopes up__ , Benny chastised himself. He took a hard turn to the left. And yet try as he might, he wasn’t able to extinguish the tiny flame warming his heart up. Soon he would be meeting the gorgeous Omega that fueled his fantasies, both erotic and domestic ones, and get a chance to confront those fantasies with reality as Lenore said.

Dammit, he was so __nervous__. What if Dean didn’t care for him or __worse__ , found him __insufferable__  and spent the entire week trying to avoid him? Not everyone reacted well to his calm, quiet demeanor as they believed it to be a sign he didn’t like them. Unfortunately, Dean came across as the exact opposite of him, always talking and joking around, and engaging people in easy conversations. As far as Benny knew, Dean would find him boring to hang out with.

Well, too late to worry about that now.

After twenty minutes of climbing the mountain road, Benny took a final turn and the Winchesters’ cottage appeared right before his eyes. Much like Woodbury it looked like a stereotypical place found in Christmas-related Medias. A large, two story home made out of raw wood and stone with steep roof covered in snow, a chimney steadily pumping out grey smoke, and Christmas lights hanging on the front porch made for a striking facade. Normally Benny would sneer at seeing such idealized place in a movie, but in reality it genuinely moved him and he had to stop for a moment to appreciate the entire view. The only thing that spoiled it was a tall, metal fence surrounding the property, a bitter reminded that crazy fans existed and the Winchesters had to shield themselves from them.

Benny drove up to the main gate and beeped an intercom on the left side.

“Who is it?” a familiar, warm voice responded.

“Mrs. Harvelle? This is Benny Lafitte.”

 “Just in time. C’mon in.”

The main gate swung open, allowing Benny to move up the driveway. In front of the cottage, several new, shiny cars were parked. Suddenly feeling very aware of how his old, beat-up truck looks, Benny steered to the right and parked behind a large van with a logo of “ _ _Alpha vs. Wilderness__ ” painted on its sides. Hopefully, his truck was shielded away from people. What was he thinking coming here in this old piece of __junk__? He should’ve asked Lenore to lend him her new Prius.

He killed the engine, grabbed his travel bag from the backseat and climbed outside. His woolen cap and scarf, thick jacket and beard – freshly trimmed before he hit the road – provided a decent protection from the biting winter cold. Still, he threw the bag over a shoulder and hurried to the front door, wanting to get inside and warm up. Before he had an opportunity to ring the bell, the door swung open, revealing a middle-aged woman with short hair, dressed casually in a pair of jeans and jean jacket. Although she smiled kindly at him, there was a hint of steel in her eyes.

“Good to finally meet you, Mr. Lafitte,” she said and stepped aside to let him in.

So this was Ellen Harvelle, the executive producer of the show. She didn’t look anything like what Benny imagined, which was an elegant woman who used lots of make-up and wore expensive suits. There were probably some pictures of her floating in the internet, but he didn’t bother to check them.

He stepped inside and Mrs. Harvelle shut the door, cutting the chilly wind off.

“Did your ride go smoothly?” she asked.

“Yes,” Benny confirmed, dropping his bag to the floor and starting to untangle himself from the winter wear. Now that he was surrounded by warm air filling the house, his nose thawed and he was able to smell an array of different aromas, among them a mixture of hops and pepper coming from the Alpha woman standing next to him. “It was quite pleasant, Mrs. Harvelle. Thank you.”

“Call me Ellen. I’m not old enough to be addressed as ‘Mrs’.”

Benny straightened up with his jacket, scarf, and cap hanging off his arm, and looked challengingly at the producer. “Only if you call me Benny,” he decided. She smirked at the Alpha before nodding her head.

“Then we have a deal.”

She led him inside a large living room just to the right of the main entrance where a young white woman and a middle-aged black man sat on the couch; both glanced at Benny curiously the moment he walked in. The other two contestants. Similar to him, they had winter clothes and bags lying next to them.

As he followed after Ellen through the sizeable room, Benny took a better look at his surrounding, noting that the décor was a nice combination of old-fashioned, homey build and comfortable, modern style. Panoramic windows and expensive furniture contrasted with walls that were made out of raw wood, bare floors and stone fireplace, creating a polished look, surprisingly enough. Nothing seemed out of place to Benny. The house didn’t come across as wealthy people (whom the Winchesters __were__  thanks to the success of their show) wanting to __“live like a common folk”__  and failing by a mile due to the exorbitant luxuries they surrounded themselves with. Luxuries that left a place feeling cold and staged. Instead, the house felt like a home. It appeared as people who enjoyed a simple, straightforward life and only spent a little more money on the furnishings to make the stay a bit more comfortable.

Fire cracked softly in the fireplace, consuming the wood stocked in a small pyramid and filling the living room with nice warmth. Benny briefly watched the flames dance in the air before he and Ellen stopped in front of the couch.

“Benny, those are the other two winners of the contest, Rufus Turner and Becky Rosen,” a note of exasperation sounded in Ellen’s voice about the latter of the two. Her tone piqued Benny’s interest. “Rufus, Becky, this is Benny Lafitte.”

Rufus smiled and nodded politely, while Becky flashed her teeth, saying “Hi!” and waved as if Benny was standing on the other side of the street rather than right next to her. She then looked up at Ellen, nearly vibrating in her seat with barely contained excitement. “Now that we’re all here, are we going to finally meet Sam?”

It seemed that Ellen was reaching the limit of her self-control, judging by how strained her expression became. Still, her scent remained neutral. “Hold your horses. You’re going to meet Sam __as well as__  John and Dean. That was the __purpose__  of this contest.”

“I’m sorry, I’m just __so excited__!”

“We can see that, Becky.”

Without waiting for the younger woman to continue, Ellen turned around and walked out of the living room, her footsteps sounding heavier than when she entered it a moment ago.

Rufus moved to the side of the couch, making a room for Benny to sit between him and Becky. The ranger smiled at him with gratitude and slumped down on the soft cushion, outstretching his legs that felt stiff after hours in a small confinement of his truck. From this close he could easily smell the other contestants’ natural aromas, both saturated with happiness. As it turns out, Rufus was a Beta, giving out a neutral scent of waffles with whipped cream. Becky was an Omega. Her already sweet milk chocolate smell was coming across as even more saccharine due to her underlying enthusiasm.

The moment Benny plopped down, Becky turned to him and flashed her white teeth in a grin. “Can you believe we’re really here? I can’t wait to meet Sam! He’s so __dreamy__!” He was starting to understand Ellen’s exasperation.

Benny nodded politely, unsure how else to respond. He liked Sam Winchester, but he wasn’t attracted to him whatsoever.

However, Benny’s subdued reaction did nothing to discourage Becky from prattling on: “When Ellen called me and said I’ve won the contest, I nearly dropped __dead__  on the spot! I honestly didn’t expect to get in, but here I am, only __minutes__  away from seeing Sam in person! He’s so handsome and tall, and smart too! I __love__  how he always does thorough research before every hunt!” Her bright smiled vanished, replaced by exasperated expression. “I don’t get why Dean always mocks him for it.”

“Because Sam makes them do research even though they’ve done the same types of stuff on previous hunts,” Rufus chimed in. “They already know what to do.”

“Still, there’s no need to be mean about it.”

“Dean’s just teasing Sam,” Benny explained. “There’s no real malice behind his words.”

Becky clearly didn’t agree with that sentiment, but she shrugged her arms and said: “Either way, I’m glad the waiting is almost over. Just a little more and I’ll finally see Sam.”

She tried to make herself more comfortable (which was pointless because she was practically vibrating with excitement), Benny felt his stomach drop. Was that what __he__  looked like right now? An overexcited fan who drove hundreds of miles away from home in a sad attempt to spend a few moments with their famous idol, acting as if it was the biggest achievement of their life? He was sickened by the idea, but that’s exactly what was going on. Despite being able to keep his excitement in check, he was no better than Becky.

And the worst part was that this meeting won’t mean the same thing to Dean. He must be used to interacting with fans on a professional level, even those who had a secret crush on him. He’ll treat Benny politely for the next week and then say goodbye when the time is up, never bothering to contact him again.

Of course, Benny knew things would go this way and he repeatedly reminded himself that in the past weeks. But he couldn’t stop fantasies about Dean falling for him during the shooting from appearing in his mind.

Dammit, he shouldn’t have come here. Even if Dean turns out to be just as wonderful in real life as he was on-screen, all Benny will get from that was another heartbreak.

 

***

 

“The contest winners just showed up,” Sam announced from the open door, startling Dean in the process; he hadn’t noticed when his younger brother came in his bedroom. “Come on, we need to greet them.”

Dean quickly pushed the drawer in his desk shut in an attempt to hide what he was looking at despite the fact that Sam had plenty of time to see it before he revealed his presence. With heart pounding in his chest, Dean got up from the chair he sat on and flashed Sam a carefree smile, rubbing his hands in feigned excitement. “Right, let’s go then. I’m right behind you.”

Unfortunately, his little performance didn’t work – not like it had any chance of fooling Sam anyway – as the younger Winchester remained in place, blocking the door and preventing Dean from simply escaping the awkward encounter. Instead of saying anything, Sam gave him one of those kicked puppy stares he was so good at. In the past few weeks Dean grew to __detest__  them, because it meant Sam wanted to breach the Forbidden Subject which they agreed to never talk about again. Damn him and that stupid, overly sensitive heart of his that made him __nag__  everyone around, prodding in their __personal__  businesses, until he was sure they were __really__  fine.

“Sam, __don’t__ ” Dean warned.

“I wasn’t going to say anything,” Sam assured with a sigh. “Just… are you sure you’re up to the shooting? We could still cancel the whole thing—“

Dean snorted. “Yeah, and disappoint the fans who’ve won the contest? Great idea, Sammy.”

“We’ll give them promotional materials. Or invite them for future episodes. Doesn’t matter. What matters is you mental health. Maybe you could see a professional…”

That was the final straw. Fury __exploded__  inside Dean, spreading around his chest in an instant and burning his inner organs. __Goddamned__ , he’s __told__  Sam to leave the subject alone and yet here he was, blabbering about it __again__  as if he knew __better__  than Dean what was best for him!

“Will you shut your mouth already?!” Dean screamed, stopping Sam mid-sentence. He realized with a delay that people downstairs might hear him and forced himself to keep his voice down, continuing in a low growl, “How am I supposed to explain to you that I __don’t want__  to talk about it, so it will finally get through your thick skull and __stick__?!”

Sam’s saddened expression only grew deeper and immediately Dean felt like a complete asshole for screaming at him; the shame quieted his anger somehow, reducing it to a tiny fire at the back of his mind. His brother’s natural smell turned sour with misery, choking the omega. Dean rubbed both of his palms against his face to shield himself from that smell. Fuck, why did every other conversation they had in the past few months end the same way? Sam would try to discuss what happened, Dean would lose his temper and scream, then feel guilty afterwards. He was so tired of what their relationship turned into recently and all because Sam wanted to help. Not to mention how hurt Jess was by their constant arguments too.

Sam wasn’t at fault here. His own fucked up mind was.

“Please, just __leave it alone…?__ ” Dean asked one more time, still covering his face to not see Sam’s pain. “You’re __not__  making it easier for me despite what you think. Let me deal with it in __my__  way, at __my__  pace, okay?”

He chanced looking at Sam. For a moment it seemed like his brother was about to disagree, but eventually he nodded with a deep sigh. At least his scent started clearing.

“Fine,” Sam said in a low voice. “Let’s go. The winners are waiting.”

“I’ll be there in a moment,” Dean assured. He needed to calm down first, so the fans won’t be disturbed by his scent, which was surely soaked with mixture of rage and misery right now. They came here to meet their idols, not to be bothered by his personal shit.

Sam nodded and walked out, closing the door behind him. The sound of his footsteps grew quieter as he ventured down the hallway, then disappeared completely.

Dean sat on the edge of his desk, refusing to think about the papers hidden in the drawer. He made a habit out of reading them again and again and again until the letters turned into dark blobs before his eyes. He tried to be discreet about it and yet Dad, Sam and Jess found out somehow. That’s why Dad decided to organize the whole contest and invite three fans to spend a week with them. As a __distraction__.

And maybe he really needed one, because here he was, thinking about the papers once more when he was supposed to relax before meeting the winners.

He pushed himself away from the desk and stepped in front of the mirror hanging next to the large, old closet. He checked his face for any imperfections – years of appearing on TV made him a little vain, shoot him – and fixed his hair, adding more hair gel to stiffen them up. Satisfied with his efforts, he took one last breath, summoned the most charming smile he could muster and headed out, determined to ignore the contents of his drawer for the next week.

 

***

 

It was a strange experience to see John Winchester in real life instead of through an old TV screen. As they stood only two feet apart and shook hands, John held Benny’s palm in a firm grip that verged on too painful. He could clearly see every wrinkle cutting the other man’s face and how evenly his salt-and-pepper beard was cut. Normally John didn’t pay much attention to grooming outside of interviews and convention appearances – in contrast to his sons who always looked their best – but clearly went to extra effort for the Christmas special. In addition to the trimmed beard, he had cut his hair since the last episode that aired and wore new clothes, even if it was only a blue plaid shirt, a pair of jeans, and leather boots.

“It’s an honor to meet you, Mr. Winchester,” Benny greeted.

John chuckled. “Nobody called me that in years and I’d rather not change it right now. John will do.” He let go of Benny’s hand and glanced toward the other two contestants. “In fact, why won’t we all agree to address each other on the first name basis? No reason to be official.”

“Fine by me,” Rufus consented.

“Me too,” Becky upheld.

“Then it’s settled,” John clapped his hands together. The smile he wore was as bright as a thousand watt bulb. His scent of leather, mint and apples was light, underlined by sugary smell of contentAlpha.

“I’m not good at giving speeches, but Ellen,” John nodded toward the woman in question who stood a couple of steps behind him, “insisted that I officially welcome you here, so… welcome.” Ellen rolled her eyes at such rich oratory skills and Benny barely concealed a smirk. “To be honest I was shocked by the sheer number of responses we received, nearly two million.”

 _ _Holy shit.__  Benny and the other two were selected from that many participants? They were __incredibly__  lucky. It was good Lenore didn’t mention applying in his name as to not give him false hope (on top of the fact he’d demand her to withdraw the letter), because he was probably an inch away from losing. The knowledge that he managed to beat millions of people for this place was both overwhelming and exciting.

“I’m aware our show is popular, but…” John chuckled. “The amount of support we get from the fans always amazes me.” He opened his mouth and closed it, clearly lost for words. “Thank you for participating. I hope you’ll enjoy your stay.”

A pleasant warmth spread around Benny’s chest and he couldn’t stop himself from saying: “Glad to be here thus far.”

John smiled in appreciation, but before he had an opportunity to respond, Sam Winchester entered the living room. Although he was muscular and very tall, easily towering over everyone, his long hair and easy smile prevented him from being intimidating. On the show he generally came across as a voice of reason to John’s domineering personality and Dean’s recklessness, sparing them more serious troubles in the process. Even now Sam’s scent of old paper and mint, a rather unusual aroma for an Alpha, radiated calm, helping Benny to get a hold of his nerves that were in shreds for good fifteen minutes by now.

Trailing behind Sam was a beautiful blonde woman Benny recognized as Sam’s omega mate, Jessica. Her scent of fresh oranges and violets was peaceful and soothing as well.

Wearily Benny glanced toward Becky who looked like she just attempted to swallow a lemon whole and it got stuck in her throat. “Oh” she gave out. “I didn’t know you’d be here too.”

Judging by Jessica’s overly pleasant smile she knew where those words were coming from. “John insisted I come,” she explained as Sam put an arm around her waists and pulled her closer protectively.

“It’s a family affair after all,” John reminded. “Couldn’t spend Christmas without my daughter-in-law.”

“O-of course not” Becky agreed quickly “but it’s not actual Christmas, we’re just shooting an episode of the show. T-that’s why I didn’t expect…” she’s paused, waving in Jessica’s direction, lost for words.

Well, at least she had no intention of causing a scene in a fit of jealousy, the three Winchesters visibly relaxing. As annoying as she was about her obsession with Sam, she knew how to behave better than some of the other fans of the show.

Anyone who dated either Dean or Sam had to deal with rabid people, mostly Omegas and Beta women, constantly attacking them on social media, insulting them publically and accusing them of being in a relationship purely for money and fame. When Dean broke up with Lisa Breaden, his only long-term girlfriend, those fans spread nasty rumors that Lisa was sleeping around and constantly cheating on Dean, which mostly died down after Dean stepped in and explained that the break up was a mutual decision caused by their feelings dissipating and neither of them did anything to hurt the other. During that interview was the only time Benny saw Dean angry.

Jessica truly brought wrath on herself when she mated Sam two years ago. Despite being constantly attacked and receiving __death threats__  she refused to leave Sam. Thankfully, the situation calmed down by now and only the most demented people still bothered her.

“I figured it’s a perfect opportunity to properly introduce Jess to the viewers,” John said to Becky in an excited tone. “She’s doing a great job as our PR agent, but I always wanted her to join us on the show. After the special airs she’ll start making frequent appearances.” He glanced toward Jessica. “Won’t you?”

“Uh… sure,” Jessica confirmed, caught off guard. “If you want me to.”

“I’d love that.”

Benny smiled to himself at such heartwarming display of family bond… then scowled in confusion when he noticed how strained Sam’s expression became as the Alpha struggled to contain his annoyance, only the faintest hint of anger polluting his scent. Why would Sam Winchester have anything against Jessica appearing on the show? Was he worried that it’ll reignite the hatred she received from rabid fans?

“Anyway” John turned back to Benny and the other two contestants “as you’re well aware, over the course of next week we’ll be shooting the Christmas special. Ellen will present you the schedule and several rules you need to follow once my other son decides to show up.”

Like on cue a new scent reached Benny’s nose, a mouth-watering mixture of apple pie and cinnamon that dragged his attention away from John and toward the living room entrance.

And there he was, Dean Winchester in the flesh, casually leaning against the doorframe with arms crossed over his chest and wearing that charming smile Benny always got lost in. He was dressed in a simple black t-shirt that tightly enveloped his torso – emphasizing every muscle – faded jeans and black boots. Benny wanted to step closer and run his fingers through Dean’s short hair, but he found himself frozen in place, because Dean looked even better in person than on the small TV screen. Any thought vanished from his mind and his heart started beating at double speed; it was as if he saw the beautiful Omega for the first time again. That’s exactly how he reacted back then too.

He barely managed to catch John’s words: “Speak of the devil.” They sounded muffled as if they were coming through a wall. “What took you so long?”

“Wanted to make myself presentable for the guests, but no worries, I’m here now” Dean responded, pushing away from the doorframe and moving next to Sam and Jess. He waved friendly toward Benny, causing his heart to skip a beat… until Benny remembered that Dean was also greeting Becky and Rufus. “Heya, everyone.”

John shook his head in exasperation, but then stepped out of the way so that Ellen could present the schedule and rules. As it turned out on the first two days they’d shoot the introduction part of the episode, during which Benny, Becky and Rufus will give short interviews about how they became fans of the show and what their hopes are for the following week. Of course since this was a hunting show, on the next day or two – depending on their luck, Ellen stressed – they’d track a deer, which John would cook on camera and serve for Christmas dinner they’d film on the remaining few days.

Benny tried to pay proper attention to Ellen, but her words kept fading in and out of focus like a radio signal due to his mind being continuously distracted by enticing smell coming from the Omega of his dreams.

He was so __close__  that Benny swore he could feel Dean’s body heat. Not wanting to come across as a creep, Benny mostly averted his eyes, only chancing a glance every now and then, taking as much of those beautiful features as possible each time: strong, shaved jaw, long eyelashes and a pair of plush lips that surely would feel wonderful in a kis—

__Crap._ _

Benny snapped his head back toward Ellen, away from Dean’s curious eyes.

 _ _Wonderful job, brother,__ he chastised himself. __He caught you staring. So much for not coming across as a creep.__

For the rest of the meeting he didn’t dare look anymore, firmly focused on Ellen, even though her words barely registered in his mind.

“That’s everything,” Ellen announced, shutting a notebook she used for reference. “Before you’ll have some free time to speak with the Winchesters, which I’m sure you’re dying to do” she pointedly looked at Becky who started vibrating again “I’ll show you the bedrooms you’ll be staying in.”

“I can do that,” Dean offered.

“Alright. Suit yourself.”

Barely able to contain his nervous excitement at the prospect of spending more time in Dean’s company and having an opportunity to talk to him later on, Benny collected his stuff off the floor and, along with Becky and Rufus, followed Dean out of the living room. They climbed a staircase, passing by an array of pictures hanging on the wall, most of them showcasing the Winchester men in various exotic places, smiling and presenting their impressive hunts, but one stood out more than the rest. It was very old and featured a young blonde woman holding an infant in her hands. Benny recognized the woman as Mary Winchester, John’s late mate and mother of his boys. From what he had heard, Mary’s death deeply affected John. Even nowadays when someone questioned him about the incident during an interview, John would go quiet and give a very clipped response before asking that they move to another question. Sometimes he outright refused to answer.

In a way Benny understood how it feels to lose a mate, but having Mary die was far worse than being abandoned by Andrea. At least he could pull comfort during his drunken nights knowing that Andrea is out there, living happily. John didn’t have that.

Benny shook his head in pity, turned away from the picture and rushed up the remaining stairs to catch up with the others.

As it turned out the rest of the house followed a similar décor to the one found in the living room: a mixture of new furniture and old-style architecture with exposed, bare wood; there weren’t carpets or floor-coverings under their feet, just lacquered boards.

Dean led them down a short hallway to the left of the staircase where a pair of doors faced each other. “Technically this house has only three bedrooms, so we had to shuffle things around to make a place for you,” he explained. “Dad moved to my bedroom, freeing up his. We also cleaned two store rooms,” he stopped and waved at the pair of doors, “and furnished them. Becky, Rufus, you can stay here. Towels and additional blankets are in the wardrobes if you need them. Unfortunately, there’s only one bathroom between the seven of us, but we’ll figure it out.”

“Seven of us?” Rufus scowled. “The crew isn’t staying here?”

“No place left. They have rooms booked in town and they’ll be driving here each morning. It’s a short drive anyway.”

With a “Thanks” from Rufus and courtesy nod from Becky, each entered one of the newly prepared bedrooms. From what Benny was able to see before the doors closed, they were rather small, but had comfortable looking beds, one door wardrobes and nightstands with table lamps on them.

“Come on,” Dean said to Benny once they were alone. “You’ll be staying in Dad’s bedroom.”

They turned around and wandered back down the hallway. Benny felt nerves gnawing on his stomach, taunting him to act like a true Alpha and start a conversation with the Omega he crushed on for so long. He licked his lips, mouth suddenly very dry, struggling to come up with a good opener.

“So, you’re a park ranger?” Dean said, startling Benny.

“Yes,” he confirmed. “For seven years now.”

“Out of necessity or you like it?”

Benny didn’t bother to hold back a smirk. “You won’t last in that profession if your heart ain’t in it,” he assured. During his tenure at Lovers’ Leap Park numerous young aspirants passed through their office, lured by a tempting salary or respectability of the job in public eyes, only to drop out within a month or so. “It’s a demanding job – long hours, lots of physical work – but yeah, I enjoy it. Wouldn’t change it for anything else.”

“You’re not bored of doing the same thing after seven years?” Dean glanced at Benny with one eyebrow raised up.

“It’s only half the amount of time you’ve spent hosting the same show and you don’t seem bored.”

Dean’s footsteps faltered, but then he chuckled and nodded in agreement. “Okay, you got a point,” he responded. “And how long you’ve been watching us?”

Okay, he __really__  shouldn’t be running his big mouth right now, but he couldn’t help joking, “Aren’t we supposed to be interviewed tomorrow?”

This time Dean stopped outright and turned toward Benny with annoyed expression, but a twitch of his lips betrayed his actual emotions. “Smartass, aren’t you?” At least he was amused by the comment and played along, unlike Andrea who disliked Benny’s dry sense of humor. Maybe he won’t manage to completely antagonize Dean over the next week.

“So I’ve heard,” Benny responded, shrugging his arms.

They continued down the hallway, walking past several closed door, until they reached the one located at the very end. Dean leaned against a wall and casually nodded toward the entrance. “This is your bedroom. As I said earlier, extra towels and blankets are in the wardrobe. If you need anything else, just talk to me or others.”

“Thanks, brother.”

A warm smile stretched Dean’s mouth. “See you later.”

Benny waited for Dean to disappear down the stairs before he pushed the door open and entered his bedroom. Despite belonging to the master of the house it wasn’t any less Spartan than those prepared for Becky or Rufus. It was a sparsely furnished, small space. A single window provided a decent view on the snowy landscape outside. Still, Benny didn’t need anything more to enjoy this stay.

He dropped his bag next to the two door wardrobe and, upon quick inspection, confirmed that two thick blankets and four fluffy, snow-white towels were stocked on the upper shelf, leaving the lower ones for his stuff. Since he had some time, Benny hanged his jacket and scarf on a free hanger, then started relocating clothes from the bag to the wardrobe making sure to fold them nicely first. While working he hummed the melody from Frank Sinatra’s “ _ _Let It Snow! Let It Snow! Let It Snow!__ ” He hadn’t felt this good in __years__.

When Benny returned to the living room fifteen minutes later, John, Sam, Jessica and Rufus were already there, standing in front of the burning fireplace and deep in a discussion. He quietly stepped closer, not wanting to interrupt them.

“…I was eight years old when I started accompanying my parents on the hunts,” Rufus said with chest pushed out in pride, “and only nine when I shot my first prey.”

“Sam was seven,” John countered. “Snipped a cougar from over forty feet.” He paused briefly, looking at his son in amusement. “Then he dropped the rifle and burst into tears.”

Jessica chuckled and turned toward Sam. “ _ _Seriously?__ ” she asked.

“I was a pup and the cougar gave out a really pained cry,” Sam explained. He seemed rather bored, which led Benny to believe that John recounted that story on many occasions in the past.

“Afterwards he __refused__  to go with me and Dean on the next few hunts.” John continued, “but a month later he caved and decided to prove how brave he was.”

The small group laughed, except for Sam who rolled his eyes. Jessica brushed the palm of her hand against his shoulder, saying: “Don’t be mad. We’re just teasing you.” However, it did nothing to cheer Sam up and he remained annoyed for quite some time.

At this point John noticed Benny slinking in the back and invited him closer with a wave of a hand. “Ben, good to see you,” he greeted. “We’re talking about out early hunting experiences. Do you hunt?”

“No,” Benny admitted. “I prefer simply watching the nature and animals.”

“He’s a park ranger,” Jessica explained to Rufus. “I doubt hunting goes with his profession.”

“Actually, it’s sometimes required of me.” Everyone’s eyes landed on Benny in polite curiosity, so explained: “If we notice or get a report that one of the animals has rabies, we have to put it down for visitors’ safety and to prevent the sickness from spreading.”

“Makes sense,” Rufus agreed.

“So you don’t enjoy hunting,” John summarized. “Then, how come you’re a fan of our show?”

It was an innocent enough question, but Benny felt a small rush of panic, which he hoped didn’t sip into his scent; you would never know due to inability to smell yourself. The main reason he got hooked on the show in the first place was John’s attractive son. However, he figured that answer wouldn’t be well received – crap, what __exactly__  Lenore wrote in his entry letter? He was so angry at her that he never bothered to clarify – so he decided to move to the next position on the list of reasons he watched “ _ _Alpha vs. Wilderness__ ”.

“Just because I don’t hunt personally, doesn’t mean I don’t enjoy watching it,” he responded. “I like the rush of stalking, cornering and catching a prey.” Although he was more laid back than other Alphas, he still had the same carnal desires that needed an outlet, desires to find a prey and kill it to provide food for his mate and pups, even if he still didn’t have them.

And probably never will.

“Alphas have their needs,” John agreed.

A new voice came from the entrance, interrupting their conversation, “What about me?” Benny turned toward Dean who strolled over to the fireplace and joined their gathering. “I enjoy hunting too and I’m not an Alpha.”

“You’re just a freak of nature,” Sam teased.

“Says the Alpha who cried after his first kill.”

Immediately Sam’s expression turned sour and he mumbled something under his breath. Benny barely caught the soft “Jerk…” even from only two feet away.

“Which didn’t happen to me, by the way,” Dean added, glancing between Rufus and Benny. “No tears, just a quick and clean kill.”

“But from what I’ve heard it was a little less impressive catch,” Jessica pointed out.

“Yes,” John confirmed. “Just a rabbit.”

“Whatever.” Dean shrugged. “I was a complete __badass__  even at nine.”

The conversation continued for good half hour before the company started splitting into smaller groups. First John and Rufus wandered away to sit down on the couch, having a heated discussion about various hunting techniques. John tried to take the lead, apparently under a logical assumption that being the host of successful hunting show gave him an authority on the subject, but Rufus refused to be dominated and insisted that John should start using trick his parents taught him or he personally developed over the years. Although they frequently raised their voices, they kept smiling and chuckling.

Later Becky finally showed up, wearing a fancier make-up and different set of clothes, which consisted of a pair of navy jeans, suede black shoes on low heel and a tight, dark sweater that highlighted her figure; Benny– and everyone else in the room for that matter– actually found himself making a double take. Becky scanned the room and when she noticed Sam near the entrance, preparing a drink at the small liquor cabinet, she pounced on him. Sam jerked and pressed against a wall, looking as if a wild tiger cornered him without a weapon. From what Benny overheard Becky started interrogating him about his hobbies, favorite food, etc, all easily available information Sam revealed in various interviews. Jessica eventually took pity on him, walked over to them and gave an excuse that Sam probably wanted to go earlier to bed, because he hadn’t slept well the previous night. Sam didn’t come across as tired before, but the moment Jessica mentioned it, he gave out a large yawn, apologized to Becky for cutting their conversation short and left with Jessica as fast as possible, wishing everyone a good night on his way out.

Much to Benny’s surprise Becky seemed to actually __buy it__  and with a disappointed expression plopped down on the couch to listen to John and Rufus for the rest of the evening.

Which once again left Benny in one on one conversation with Dean as they were the only people who remained standing next to the fireplace. Logs burned with a soft crackling, providing some noise in a silence that hung between them. Benny watched as Dean kneeled down and used a metal prod to push still intact wood deeper inside the flames, shooting an array of sparks in the air. Muscles in his arm moved rhythmically and pressed on the tight material of his t-shirt, catching Benny’s attention.

“Is this going to be your first TV appearance?” Dean asked suddenly without tearing his eyes away from the fire.

“Yes,” Benny confirmed. Although several rangers were interviewed by reporters during a particularly slow news periods, he wasn’t among them. He never sought out exposure. A peaceful life and a family were the only things he desired.

“Who will watch your debut?”

“My friend, Lenore, for sure.”

Dean glanced at him, wearing a mischievous smirk. “Just a friend?”

“Just,” Benny assured.

“Oh. Okay.” Dean finished fixing the logs, put the prod away and straightened up, brushing his jeans. “What about your family? They’re not fans of the show?”

“There is no family.”

For the first time since they met, an easy confidence disappeared from Dean’s face, replaced by surprise and then sadness. Benny could sense a sudden spike of embarrassment polluting Dean’s natural aroma even through the overpowering scent of burning wood. He immediately regretted mentioning the whole thing.

“Shit. Sorry,” Dean stammered. “Didn’t meant to bring out bad memories.”

“Don’t worry,” Benny assured quickly with a smile. “Can’t get a heartache over something I never had.”

That response did nothing to ease Dean’s embarrassment nor sadness. He probably suspected Benny was only putting a brave face to cover the pain he truly felt. Everyone thought that. And they were all wrong.

Yes, growing up in an orphanage sucked and Benny could do without that. However, he was never curious to find his birth parents, never dreamed of a tearful reunion with them. Why should he care to waste time and resources on tracking down people who didn’t want him in the first place? Even Lenore, as empathetic and understanding as she was, had troubles comprehending this.

Family wasn’t something he hurt over, but it __was__ something he wanted to start on his own. He witnessed how happy people were when bringing their pups to the park and showing them new, exciting things they haven’t seen before in their short lives. Those interactions awoke a deep need inside him, a need to find a mate and together with them raise a family on his own.

After being abandoned by Andrea and becoming a fan of the show, Dean Winchester repeatedly appeared in his domestic fantasies.

And now he had a chance to fulfill them. It seemed that he made a decent first impression and now he had six days to prove that he was a perfect Alpha for Dean to settle down with.

 _ _That’s not the real problem, though, isn’t it?__  a soft voice at the back of Benny’s mind sneered. __Sure, you might succeed in grabbing Dean’s attention despite his disinterest in Alphas, but what’s__ next _ _? You won’t be able to keep him satisfied for long. It didn’t work with Andrea, what makes you think it will be different this time? You’re defective.__

The small amount of confidence he built in the past hour slowly evaporated, leaving him hollow and cold. How could he be this stupid, fooling himself into believing he had a chance with Dean?

“Dude, are you okay?” Dean asked, scowling in worry.

“Yeah,” Benny confirmed. “Just tired after hours of driving. I think I’ll hit the hay, too.”

He left the living room without rushing as to not make Dean believe his departure had anything to do with their conversation about his family.

He laid in pitch black darkness for a long time, his rushing thoughts keeping him awake. As the time passed on, he occasionally heard footsteps in the hallway and a soft noise of shutting doors when another person followed his lead and departed for the night.

No matter how much he fooled himself into believing he had a chance, it __won’t__  change the reality. Dean wouldn’t date Alphas in general, so why would such __failure__  like Benny catch his attention? The experience with Andrea proved beyond any doubts that he couldn’t create a functioning relationship. Instead of trying to win Dean over, he should just focus on having good time and gaining some fun memories to reminisce about later during those long, lonely hours at work. That was the best thing he could actually achieve. How he fooled himself into believing otherwise?


	3. Killing Time, Together

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm happy that you seem to enjoy the story thus far. Here's the next chapter.

On the first day of shooting he was woken up by a loud knocking on the door and Ellen’s commanding voice. “Benny, it’s past seven o’clock already. You have less than an hour to get dressed and eat breakfast before we start preparing for the filming. Get up.” She walked away without even waiting for a response, her fast footsteps echoing down the hallway, and repeated the same action at Rufus’s room.

Benny rolled onto his back and glanced toward the single window in his room. Through a small gap between white curtains he saw that it was still dim outside. Small snowflakes landed on the glass, barely visible in the limited light.

Thankfully, due to demands of his job Benny was accustomed to waking up at such early hours, so after stretching and letting bones in his spine snap pleasantly into their proper position, he threw the blankets aside and got up. He quickly dressed in fresh clothes, made the bed and managed to sneak inside the bathroom once Sam left it, greeting him politely on his way out. He brushed his teeth and made sure that his beard didn’t need any additional trimming.

It was the intense smell of fresh pancakes that directed him to the kitchen located on the ground floor at the back of the house. Sam and Jessica were already there, the former stirring a cup of coffee with milk judging by the smell. The latter of the two was adding a new pancake to the small mountain already piled up on a plate. Both greeted him, but didn’t try to engage him in the quiet conversation they held, probably in assumption that he wasn’t fully awake yet. Since he enjoyed calm moments like this, he didn’t bother to correct them and instead took a few pancakes and some syrup on a separate plate, poured a cup of coffee for himself – no sugar, no milk – and ate in silence, enjoying soft and fluffy texture. Soon the rest joined them: John and Dean full of energy, Rufus moving slightly sluggish but smiling and Becky swaying on her feet, barely able to grunt in response at kind greetings.

Dean moaned in pleasure as he took a bite of his breakfast. “Damn, Jess,” he said with full mouth. “You’ve outdone yourself.”

“Thanks,” Jessica responded. “Keep those praises up and I might prepare another batch just for you.”

“See, Sam, what kind of perks I get from your mate?” Dean grinned at his brother.

Keeping his cool, Sam nudged Dean on his side with an elbow. “Don’t know if you should be eating another portion. You’re taking up more and more space as time goes on.”

“I’m not the one still carrying baby fat.”

“Boys, behave,” John scolded, though much like Jessica he was shaking from a silent chuckle.

The mixture of various scents coming from the Winchesters permeated the kitchen, speaking of happiness. Benny smiled to himself, feeling a nice warmth expanding his chest. Dean and his family seemed like such nice bunch of people. He might not have a chance with Dean, as disheartening as that was, but his stay here would be a fun one.

Punctually at eight o’clock Ellen marched in with two make-up artists, Pamela Barnes and Madison Wolfe, both hauling large bags of supplies. Ellen ordered everyone to head to the game room, which was temporarily turned into a prep room and reminded that they had a schedule to follow. Benny offered Madison, who stood close by, to carry the bag for her, but she declined, assuring it’s not that heavy. As he crossed the hallway to the door opposite of the kitchen, he saw several crew members bringing in the equipment from outside. He only had a second or two to look before Ellen stepped right in front of him and asked him politely, but with a clear pressure in her voice that left no room for arguing, to keep going.

Many items in the game room that Benny assumed usually stood in various places – pool table, game consoles and TV – were crammed in the corner to make space for two chairs and tables with mirror stands in front of them. One after another people took seats, allowing the make-up ladies to take care of them.

Benny didn’t like how a thick layer of foundation and powder felt on his skin and he twitched his nose in discomfort. On top of that, it made him look pale like he was ill.

“Is this necessary?” he wondered aloud.

“It’ll make you look good on camera,” Pamela assured. “Though not like you need much help with that, handsome,” she added and winked at him flirtatiously in the mirror reflection. Benny stiffened as hot splotches spread on his cheeks and neck.

“Pam, I told you before to not flirt with our guests,” Ellen commented.

“Sorry, Ma’am,” Pamela apologized, but she didn’t look sorry in the slightest.

She gave Benny one last appraising look and told him she was done. He quickly scampered from the chair before he could pollute the air with an embarrassing stench of burned rubber, freeing the spot for Becky. He stood in front of the large window, which gave a good view on the forest stretching out on the distance and a thick veil of snowflakes falling from the sky, as he tried to ignore the burning embarrassment.

A beautiful Beta just hit on him and what did he do? __Nothing__. Just like any Alpha would, right?

Good God, he was such an __idiot__.

His heart skipped a beat, however, when he noticed Dean staring at him with a playful smile on his lips. It lasted only a brief moment, until Madison told him to stop wiggling around in his seat and he looked back ahead, allowing her to continue applying powder to his cheeks.

Half an hour later everyone was ready and so Ellen led them to the living room. As it turned out, while Pamela and Madison applied the make-up, the crew members decorated the house. Benny felt like he slept for two weeks and woke up just in time for the Christmas Day. Green tinsel was twisted around the staircase railing, colorful lights blinked on the walls and around doorframes, fake snow covered windows in shapes of stars and snowflakes. Next to the fireplace in the living room stood a __huge__  Christmas tree with branches bent under the weight of various decorations. It was all very flashy. Too flashy. In Benny’s opinion it ruined the simple charm of the household.

But he kept that opinion to himself, because everyone else appeared impressed with the changes. Rufus nodded in approval, John and Becky grinned, and others commented on how well things will present on-camera.

The shooting began at nine and Benny quickly realized that watching the show was a lot more fun than working on it. At the beginning he was nervous, struggling to ‘pretend the camera isn’t there’ as per the director’s instruction and feeling scared that he’ll start babbling nonsense when John interviewed him, but the constant retakes, brakes for re-applying make-up and moving the equipment took a toll on him. Soon he was tapping fingers on his knee in attempt to entertain himself.

From where he was, the Winchesters were already accustomed with the boredom. The moment camera stopped rolling, Dean would fish out his phone and return to playing a racing game, while Sam seemed resigned to his fate.

Unfortunately for Sam, Becky decided to use those breaks for speaking to him. First she gushed about how smart he was and how impressed she was with the dedication he had for researching stuff, but when Jessica left the room, she started mentioning a coffee bar close to her apartment that she loved to visit and a wide variety of drinks it offered, so Sam would certainly find something he’d like.

Benny couldn’t believe the __nerve__  she had. Sam’s mate was in the house, possibly in a room next door and yet it didn’t stop her from flirting with the Alpha.

Thankfully, this cringe-worthy situation didn’t last long as Sam suddenly stood up and walked out of the room without even providing an excuse. Becky’s dumbfounded expression filled Benny with vicious satisfaction. Unsure of his own ability to keep the smirk of his face, he also got up and left.

Deciding that he could use another coffee, he went to the kitchen where he met Jessica in the process of preparing a cup of hot chocolate. She falter with a spoonful of sugar and glanced at him the moment he stepped inside.

“Hey,” she greeted, returning to work. “Want something to drink?”

“The coffee this morning was so good I couldn’t pass having a second one,” Benny explained.

“Help yourself. Cups are in the cabinet above the sink.”

Benny pulled a blue cup out – it had “ _ _Happy Father’s Day__!” written on the front in white letters – and turned on the coffee machine. As it grinded the beans and slowly poured the dark liquid, spreading a strong scent throughout the kitchen, Benny stared at Jessica. They haven’t interacted much, but from the little he saw of her, she came across as a kind person who genuinely cared about Sam. It was disheartening how much abuse and harassment she had to endure from obsessive fans when her only “crime” was mating the Alpha she loved.

And now one of those obsessive fans was in her house, shamelessly flirting with Sam. Benny didn’t want to stick nose where it didn’t belong, but at the same time it felt wrong to remain quiet.

“Uh…” he faltered, catching Jessica’s attention. “I know it’s none of my business, but… aren’t you concerned?”

“About what?” For a moment she stared at him with a blank expression. Then she understood. “Becky?” She chuckled carefree as if he told an amusing anecdote. “No, not at all. I trust Sam. Besides, he’s lost patience for fans flirting with him after what happened at our last convention…”

Benny cringed, recalling the article he’d read about the incident. Apparently some male Omega was so annoyed Sam showed up with his mate that he splashed a cup of his own __piss__ in Jessica’s face.

“You heard about it?” Jessica noted at his reaction.

“I did,” Benny confirmed. “I’m so sorry.”

“Don’t be. It’s not your fault some people out there are complete nut jobs.” Jessica stirred her drink and took a careful sip as steam engulfed her face. “And Becky doesn’t even come close to them. She’s just excited to meet her idol, that’s all. God knows I wasn’t much better when I used to be a fan of the show,” she added with a nervous laughter.

Benny scowled. “Used to? You’re not anymore?”

For a moment Jessica was lost for words. She quickly collected herself and put the steaming cup of chocolate on the counter before looking up at Benny with a daring look. “You have to admit that watching the show is less fun than working on it.”

He remembered the sheer boredom that he ran away from and nodded. “Can’t deny it.”

“Exactly. Some of the charm goes away when you witness how things look behind the camera. I didn’t watch a single episode since… Gosh, it’s two years now. More or less since I’ve mated Sam.”

“And those two years were filled with sleepless nights thanks to you two,” Dean’s voice suddenly came from behind Benny.

He turned around, heart jumping up in his chest, to see the Omega stopping next to him at the kitchen table and smiling brightly at his sister-in-law. That was the second time Benny reacted like this to Dean’s appearance and it had nothing to do with how unexpected it was. He still couldn’t believe that he was going to spend the next week in the same house as the Omega of his dreams and was terrified of making a fool of himself.

Another flash of nervousness ran through his body when he noticed Jessica’s curious stare and he quickly tried to cover his reaction. “You need to wear a bell or something, brother, or you’ll give me a heart attack.”

“If you think I’m bad, you should meet my buddy, Cas,” Dean responded. “He moves around quietly like a cat and suddenly appears right behind you, then just stands there and __stares__  without saying anything. Makes you feel like a bug under a magnifying glass. He’s a good guy, just very odd.”

Yeah, Benny knew who Dean was talking about. Castiel Novak was an uptight professor teaching mythology and world religions at Stanford University. Also, he was an Alpha. Those two things made his close friendship with Dean so much more unexpected and for the past five years news sites suspected the two of them were secretly dating, a thought that made Benny ache early on. However, as the time progressed and no real proof came to light despite Dean’s well reported love life, Benny found himself calming down.

It was selfish of him to be happy that Dean didn’t date anyone long-term – except for Lisa Braeden – but he __couldn't__  stop those feelings. Although his mind accepted that he had no chance with Dean, his heart had yet to catch on.

“That’s the effect of homeschooling,” Jessica summarized. “Your grades are great, but your social skills suffer. But anyway,” she turned to Dean, wrapping her arms around her chest and giving him a nasty glare, “what did you mean by ‘ _ _sleepless nights__ ’ because of us?”

“You two are playing __Monopoly__  too loud, obviously,” Dean joked and wiggled his eyebrows at Benny mischievously, sticking the tip of his tongue through his lips. He looked so adorable that Benny couldn’t help but snort.

“You’re hilarious,” Jessica sneered.

“Benny thinks it’s funny.”

“I’m not going to apologize for having a healthy relationship with Sam.” Jessica grabbed the cup of hot chocolate and stomped out of the room, pretending to be offended even though there was an amused gleam in her eyes as she walked past Benny.

“They're both __so__   _ _easy__ to annoy,” Dean commented, clearly satisfied with himself.

Although he was happy for being alone with Dean again, Benny glanced toward the kitchen door where muffled voices came from. “Aren’t you needed back in the living room?”

“Nah. They’ll call me when it’s my turn to stand in front of the camera and in the meantime I figured I might spend a little more time with one of the winners of our contest. That’s part of your reward.”

It felt like someone pushed a sharp needle through Benny’s heart. Was __that__  the only reason Dean talked to him? Because he was __contractually obligated__  to do so?

 _ _That’s what you get for naively believing in a fairytale that you two are going to fall in love during the next week__ , his mind sneered. __Real life doesn’t operate on such clichéd tropes.__  Yes, he had to focus on having fun instead of pursuing a hopeless dream he had for past three years. Dean wouldn’t suddenly change his mind about dating Alphas for him.

Benny forced himself to nod in agreement. “Yeah, that sounds right.”

Dean pulled out an open box of gingerbread cookies from a cupboard, put it on the table halfway between him and Benny, and waved invitingly for Benny to have one before snatching a cookie for himself. As he chewed, he said: “Ellen told me you didn’t want us to send a driver and made the whole trip by yourself.”

“Woodbury is a stone’s throw from my place,” Benny explained. He took a cookie and bit a piece with pleasure. It melted in his mouth, leaving an aftertaste of cinnamon. “Seemed like a waste to hire someone for such short trip.”

“And your car is here? What do you drive?”

“Mazda Rotary Pickup, 1975.”

Dean’s eyes brightened and he leaned closer to Benny. “Can I take a look?” he asked in a hushed voice like he was sharing an important secret.

Immediately Benny’s thoughts snapped to the dirt covering his car and countless scratches in the paint. “Uh… why?” he stuttered, even though he knew the answer. Classic cars were Dean’s passion and he always found a way to bring the subject up during interviews. Apparently, he made a small business out of restoring those vehicles in his free time. If his truck was in a better shape, Benny would offer to show it to Dean himself instead of hiding it away like a shameful secret. A __battered__  secret that surely won’t make a good impression.

“I’ve seen pictures, but never one in real life,” Dean answered excited. “Come on, you can’t hide such beauty away. It was __made__  to be appreciated.”

“We should probably stick around in case we’re needed for the shooting.”

“What’s the matter, __Alpha__?” Dean raised his right eyebrow up. “ _ _Scared__  to be alone with me?”

The sneering tone in his voice managed to bring out the natural Alpha defiance in Benny, which was probably what he intended to do. Benny’s breathing slowed down as his chest expanded and muscles tensed, a conviction that he’d be able to move mountains spreading through his body. He hadn’t felt like this in years, since Andrea broke up their relationship. Before he used to be very familiar with that sensation and now his heart __sung__  at its return.

“Not at all,” he snorted. “I could take you down any day, __Omega__.”

“Okay,” Dean said. “If you’re so brave, then show me your car.”

Even in this Alpha state Benny wasn’t sure how good of an idea it was, but he decided to agree. It was his own damn fault he didn’t put the car in proper order before hitting the road. He knew Dean was a huge classic car fan, just never suspected his old truck would raise his interest. Now he has to stand up for his mistake.

“Alright,” he complied. “I’ll go grab my jacket and car keys. Meet me at the front.”

He left Dean in the kitchen and headed upstairs, a hopeful excitement raising in his chest with each step.

Because yeah, while his truck was in a disarray, it wasn’t anything a quick trip to a mechanic couldn’t fix and in exchange for brief embarrassment he’d spend more time in Dean’s company. Dean who proved to be as irresistible as he was on the show: a strong-willed, bold Omega capable of getting anything he wanted and not easily shut down.

Once he reached the top of the staircase, he headed toward the master bedroom, only to pause with his hand on the doorknob. Two raised voiced were coming from the room across the hallway. Benny listened closely, eventually recognizing them as Sam Winchester and his mate, Jessica.

Were they having a fight?

He didn’t want to eavesdrop, an ugly habit performed by people with no respect for other people’s privacy, but he listened for a moment in case they needed help.

“Have you __seen__ how she keeps flirting with me like you weren’t even there?!” Sam shouted, enraged.

Jessica said something in return, but it was quieter, so her words came across as only muffled blubber to Benny. Still, he breathed out in relief. It wasn’t a serious argument or crying for help.

He was about to turn the knob and enter the bedroom, when Sam’s next line froze him in place: “They’re all the same! A bunch of __morons__ who stare at us all the time like we’re animals in a zoo!”

“Sam, that’s not fair!” Jessica responded. “They’re not responsible for our problems! Don’t take it out on them!”

There was a long pause, disturbed only by what sounded like sobbing.

“I’m so __sick__  of this!” Sam uttered finally, his voice broken. “Even here we can’t have a moment of privacy!”

“It’s okay,” Jessica said. “Come here.”

No more words came and Benny imagined Jessica hugging Sam for comfort. He jerked out of the fog he was in and entered the bedroom, figuring that he already breached enough of their privacy, more than he intended. Moving as quietly as possible, he collected his jacket, scarf, woolen cap and car keys, then returned downstairs.

Admittedly, he was taken aback by Sam’s confession and his thoughts rushed to make some sense of it. From what he’s heard several years ago Sam considered leaving the show permanently and going to Stanford University to study law; that’s when Dean met Castiel Novak, during a short trip the brothers took to check the place out. However, several weeks later Sam made a public announcement that he changed his mind and decided to remain as one of the host on “ _ _Alpha vs. Wilderness__ ”, citing desire to stay close to his family as a reason. Sometime later he met Jessica, they mated and she became a PR manager for the show.

Did Sam regret his decision after all? Or did he grow to resent the popularity?

Either way, it wasn’t any of Benny’s business, so he decided to leave the conversation behind. He only hoped that Sam will eventually resolve the issue. He seemed like a good guy and Benny would hate for him to remain in such hurtful situation.

As they decided, Dean waited for him in the entrance hall, tightly wrapped in his own winter wear. When he spotted Benny descending, he clapped his gloved hands together, “Okay, lead the way.”

Dean opened the front door, letting a gust of chilly air in and Benny stepped outside, followed closely by the Omega. The temperature was freezing just like the day prior, mercilessly biting on every inch of Benny’s exposed skin, but at least the snow stopped falling since the morning and the ground was covered in new, fluffy layer that sunk under their feet with a soft crunch, the only sound they could hear near them. There was an untouched trail in the pristine snow blanket leading from the entrance to the side of the house where Benny’s truck was parked.

Honestly, it looked better than he remembered. Clearly, the nerves warped the image in his memory. Splashes of dirt and snow were the most noticeable part, covering both sides of the car about halfway up, but it couldn’t be helped in the current weather; other vehicles didn’t present any better in that regard. There were also several easy to spot scratches in the paint and some crumbled papers scattered around on the inside. Overall, Benny felt quite pleased about the truck’s appearance.

Unfortunately, Dean was less impressed and he barely took a glance at the car before giving Benny a glare. “Dude, you __cannot__  treat her like this!” he announced.

Benny couldn’t hold back the snort. “How do you know the gender? You haven’t even checked the exhaust pipe yet. Maybe it’s a guy?” he joked.

“ _ _Don’t__  even start. When was the last time you painted her?”

“Uh… never.” At Dean’s questioning stare, he added: “I bought it four years ago. The previous owner made all the renovations before putting it up for sale.”

Dean signed deeply, breathing out a thick puff of warm air that quickly dissolved.

“Alright, get in. I want to hear how she works.”

After a brief hesitation Benny climbed inside and turned the engine on, managing to do so in only two tries. The car choked at first, then roared to life. He pressed the accelerator a couple of times to give Dean a good show. The Omega listened closely, wearing a blank expression.

“Okay, I can’t listen anymore,” he decided. “Take her to the garage.”

“W-what?” Benny stuttered.

“You heard me. Take her to the garage. I’m going to fix her.”

Without waiting for a response, Dean marched past the truck like a man on a mission and headed toward two-door garage located to the left edge of the house. Benny obediently pulled back and followed after him, pausing in front of one of the entrances when Dean took a side door to let him in. He parked inside in the brightly lit space and got out as the door once again slid down. The place smelled of wax, car oil and tires. Not pleasant to his alpha senses, but a bearable.

Next to his battered truck stood two other cars and he immediately recognized the closer one as Dean’s treasured possession, a black Impala model from 1967 he inherited from John on his 18th Birthday. If Dean had a thing for bringing up his interest in restoring classic cars during every interview, he was __obsessed__  with posting pictures of this vehicle on social media. And it’s no wonder. The Impala was a work of art and from such short proximity Benny could truly appreciate every smooth line of its body. He didn’t know much about cars, but this car was something else.

A perfect match for such exceptional Omega like Dean.

“A real beauty, isn’t she?” Dean commented, smiling with pride. He pushed a switch on the control panel next to the side door and slats in the cooling system mounted on the ceiling opened up, blowing warm air inside the garage and adding a smell of artificial heating to the already existing mixture. Soon it was heated enough for Benny to take his jacket, woolen cap, and scarf off.

“Your car can look just as good,” Dean paused. “Well, __almost__  as good. __Nothing__  could match up to Baby. But you need to take better care of her.” He took his winter wear and threw it on a metal table situated opposite to the entrance gate. Benny spotted various tools neatly arranged on top of it. “Now, I won’t be able to do anything about the paintwork, you need a professional mechanic for that, but at least I can fix the engine for you.”

“What’s wrong with the engine?” Benny scowled.

“You didn’t hear that rattling?”

No, the car sounded fine to him. Then again, he knew little about cars. Ask him anything about nature at any time of the day, even middle of the night, and he’ll answer it without problem. Cars on the other hand…

“Dude!” Dean groaned and started picking some tools from the table.

Benny chuckled. “Sorry, brother. I’m not good with those things.”

“Thankfully, you met an expert and I’ll do a check-up for you as a reward for the nice company.”

Try as he might, Benny couldn’t hold back the smile that appeared on his lips. ‘ _ _Nice company__ ’. Dean considered him a ‘ _ _nice company__ ’ to have and didn’t hang around with him due to contractual obligations.

“First, some music,” Dean decided. He walked to the Impala, plopped on the driver’s seat and rummaged through a cardboard box placed on the back. He pulled out a cassette and pushed it inside a player. Within a couple of seconds the opening tunes of “ _ _Shot Down In Flames__ ” started. “You like AC/DC, don’t you?” Dean asked, looking at him wearily.

“What there’s not to like?” Benny snorted.

Dean gave him an approving nod. “We’re going to get along just fine, buddy.”

Afterwards a prolonged gaps of silence cut into their conversation as Dean opened the truck’s hood and got to work. It wasn’t an awkward silence, though, but a relaxed one, the very same kind Benny enjoyed during numerous trips out in the nature. Here the crunching of rocks and sticks under his feet was replaced by the classic rock and steady rush of warm air from the heaters. The occasional cries of animals and swooshing of tree branches were exchanged for the jingling of tools. Benny leaned against a wall and watched Dean’s hands working expertly on the engine, screwing and unscrewing bolts here, changing parts there. Being able to share one of those quiet moments with someone made his heart swell in happiness.

Andrea hated them.

That’s why she went to another Alpha: to get something Benny wasn’t able to provide. He tried to make her happy, he really did, but couldn’t hide his exhaustion whenever they went to a club to spend hours with too loud music and among large crowds of people whose scents, amplified by heat, irritated his nose. He very much preferred trekking in the woods.

“ _ _You’re so boring,__ ” she sneered at him on countless occasions. And Benny knew she was right. An Alpha should feel right at home in public places, surrounded by people they could command. They should be loud, demanding and always taking the charge, not spineless and quiet.

Two years he struggled to be someone he wasn’t. In the end none of his efforts mattered, because Andrea dumped him and left for a true Alpha, taking their most valued possessions with her and leaving Benny only with the small hut in the woods and a broken heart.

__Stop. Don’t spoil this nice moment by reminiscing about your failures._ _

He shook his head to get rid of those painful memories and once again focused on Dean who skillfully inspected the car engine, bending under the raised hood. At this precise point Dean glanced toward Benny and flashed him a bright smile, then returned to work like nothing out of ordinary happened. Easy happiness spread inside Benny’s heart, warming it up after cold reality choked it with old memories. Right now it didn’t matter that he was a failure, that he wasn’t enough, as he and Dean remained together in the garage, separated from the house and people gathered there by a thick wall of winter. Almost like they were alone in the world.

If he could, he’d make this moment last forever.


	4. Hunt

So, the Christmas Special was Dad’s brilliant attempt at helping Dean cope with recent events. He wasn’t sure how it was supposed to achieve that, but Dad insisted. “ _I understand, you need a company. This will help, you’ll see._ ”

Sam hated the idea, which he made abundantly clear through several shouting matches he had with Dad over the next few days, accusing him of being selfish and trying to cover the real issue to make himself look better. Eventually, Dean couldn’t stand it anymore and agreed to the whole plan in a vain effort to bring back some peace; it was only partially successful as Sam indeed stopped picking fights. Instead, the silent days became a standard in their household. To be honest, Dean didn't like Dad’s suggestion any more than his brother and the mere thought of inviting some strangers into their mountain home made him uneasy. It was a sort of sanctuary to him, used only for family trips. Nobody else set a foot inside since they bought and renovated the place, and now there was a large gathering there. Still, he realized Dad tried to help in his own way, so he decided to put a good face to a bad game and muscle through the shooting.

He most certainly didn’t expect to __actually__  enjoy the experience.

And yet here he was, excitedly looking forward to spending more time with Benny, the laid-back, snarky guy who was nothing like most Alphas he knew. He didn’t try to dominate their conversations nor impress Dean in hopes of getting to knot a famous Omega. Plus, his natural aroma – a mixture of pine wood, jalapeno and strangely enough honey – was incredibly alluring, but Dean would sooner go with a blade at Baby’s paint than admit it out loud.

They hit it off rather well during their first conversation when Dean was showing the contestants their bedrooms and Benny proved to be a respectful, but playful person. The next morning he blushed like a virgin when Pam flirted with him; she did that with everyone, including Dean, Dad, Ellen… It was adorable how Benny didn't know how to react and scampered away as fast as possible.

Then Dean discovered in what sorry state his truck was and offered to do some quick work on it, intending only to fix that rattling in the engine, but eventually figured why not do a regular check-up and the whole thing stretched into the following days. They mostly remained silent, which felt surprisingly comfortable unlike Dean’s past interactions with several of his fans and hook-ups. They only occasionally brought up some subject to discuss.

Which 80’s rock band was the best? To Dean that wasn’t even a question. __Nothing__  beats AC/DC. However, Benny stubbornly insisted on Led Zeppelin. Good taste, but he was indisputably __wrong__.

Driving around in a car on highway or watching football in home? At least they agreed on that one. The feeling of freedom that came from open space stretching as far as the eyes could see and each mile passed was much better than being locked in four walls, although Benny mentioned that wandering around in nature was even better. In response Dean informed Benny that he simply never was on the __right__ kind of road trip if he truly believed that and he recounted a nine-days-long journey he took Sam on when the little snot hit eighteen. They had no destination in mind, no plan at the end. It was just them, the Impala and wherever their whims led them. From what Dean saw, Benny understood. Not in a “yeah, that sound like fun” way, but __genuinely__  understood what he was trying to say. He wasn’t great at expressing himself and thankfully, with Benny, he didn’t have to try all that hard.

The first two days passed quickly between hanging around in the garage and shooting the scenes they needed for the Christmas special. As they were going to bed on the third night, Dad eyed him curiously.

“Where are you constantly disappearing to, anyway?” he asked.

“Just killing time,” Dean shrugged his shoulders.

He didn’t feel comfortable revealing the truth to Dad. Not because he was ashamed – he and Benny haven’t done anything frisky and even if they did, __so what__  – he simply saw it as a private affair.

“Are you enjoying the shooting?” Dad changed the subject.

“Yeah,” Dean confirmed. “Honestly, more than I expected.” He really couldn’t keep that goofy grin of his face.

Clearly, it was the right thing to do as Dad smiled back in that warm way a parent does whenever their child is happy. At that moment it didn’t matter how much Dean disliked the idea and only went with it for peace sake. Seeing Dad like that – not screaming in anger nor on a brink of breakdown out of guilt, but simply __happy__  – made the whole thing worth it.

Finally, the third day of shooting arrived and with it, the scheduled hunt on a deer. Rufus got up particularly early and greeted Dean with barely contained excitement when the Omega walked inside the kitchen at half past seven; Rufus arranged with Ellen that he’d be able to actively participate in the hunt instead of being a passive observer. The prospect of hunting alongside famed John Winchester, no matter how much they argued, was clearly a big deal to him. “When my friend, Bobby, heard that I got in, he turned green out of jealousy,” Rufus recounted, chuckling. “Of course, he didn’t say anything, but I know that old-timer too good to be fooled. He sure wishes he was the one who went deer hunting with John.”

Benny also seemed interested in participating, though he was more restrained in showing his emotions as per usual, smiling excitedly and asking how they’re going to go about the whole business.

Strangely enough, it was Becky who was antsy and uncharacteristically quiet. From what Dean gathered by listening to her very one-sided conversation with Sam she didn’t particularly like this part of the show and watched mainly for their family (Dean suspected she actually meant Sam himself), shots of nature around the world and __theoretical__  information about hunting. When she described their kills as “icky” like a child, Dean snorted and had to cover it with complaints about how his nose was running and he might be catching cold. He felt sorry for his brother that he had such crazed fan, but a huge part of him found it hilarious.

In total there were nine people tagging along – the Winchesters, including Jess on Dad’s insistence, the contestants and two cameramen. The noise produced by all of them would scare away any deer, so the decision was made to split them in two groups. Immediately, Becky grabbed onto Sam and out of pity Dad told Jess to join them as well along with one cameraman. Rufus and Benny were to travel with Dad, Dean and the other cameraman.

After a quick safety training session everyone set out on their way, Sam’s group heading south and Dean’s north. If either managed to take down a deer, they were to contact the other and end the hunt.

The forest was cloaked in silence and Dean felt its crushing weight the moment he stepped past the line of trees. Any sound he normally encountered during hunts – bird cries, occasional rumbling of hooves – were absent, leaving him uneasy. He scanned the area, clutching onto his ice cold rifle. Fresh snow that had fallen the previous evening shined like a cluster of diamonds in the morning sun. Bare tree trunks sprung upward from the untouched powder, stretching high above their heads and cutting the clear blue sky with their bare branches. When compounded with the grave silence, the forest had an eerie beauty to it. Dean was sure that if they fired a shot, the sound would travel for miles.

“Keep quiet,” Dad instructed Benny and Rufus. “Communicate only in hushed voices, we don’t want to alarm our prey. When you see a deer, inform everyone and stop talking. Got it?” They both nodded. Dad looked at Dean, “You know the drill.”

“Right,” Dean confirmed.

“Let’s move.”

Hiking, while dressed in a thick layer of clothes, was challenging and awkward, but not something Dean was unaccustomed to; he and his family hunted in bitterly cold temperatures numerous times before. His body quickly warmed as he struggled to move through the snowdrifts. His face remained cold, exposed to the frosty air. Thankfully, years of rigorous training allowed him to stay focused in the unfavorable conditions.

They ventured deeper into the forest, carefully scanning the surrounding areas for either deer or deer tracks. Dean noticed that although Benny was the only member of their expedition without a gun – even the cameraman had a handgun in case of an emergency – he was still behaving like a true hunter, his eyes weary, movements controlled and methodical. It was curious to see an Alpha less interested in hunting than exploring nature. The need to prove themselves capable of providing food for their mates by catching and killing a prey was deeply engrained in their genes. Both Dad and even Sam showed those dominant qualities, yet Benny rarely did, mostly in his snarky comments.

Dean regarded the park ranger as he bestrode a large pile of snow, propping himself up against a tree trunk and clenching his teeth in effort. Concerned, Dean leveled up with him and asked: “Do you ever go out for a walk during winter season?”

“Yeah,” Benny confirmed. “Once in a while. Why are you asking?”

Dean shrugged, unsure where his worry came from. “I wanted to make sure you’re able to keep up with us.”

Benny snorted in response, getting Dean’s hackles up. He was only trying to be helpful and that’s his thanks? Well, screw that jerk.

“Shouldn’t you be more worried about Rufus then?” Benny asked, looking at the older man who walked a couple of steps ahead of them.

Unfortunately, despite the fact that they spoke in hushed voices, the comment was clearly audible in the pervasive silence. Rufus stilted and glared over his shoulder at Benny. “I might have passed forties, but let me tell you, I can keep up with you two, youngsters, just fine. And I’m going to be the one who snatches that deer from right in front of you.”

“Didn’t mean to offend you, chief,” Benny apologized quickly, raising his hands up in surrendering gesture.

“Let them talk,” Dad chuckled, dragging Rufus’s attention away. “My boys were so sure they’d start outperforming me when I turned forty, but it didn’t quite turn out that way.” His gaze turned more challenging as he scrutinized Rufus. “But those are some confident words on your side. We’ll see how well they translate into reality.”

“Oh, you just wait, Winchester,” Rufus sneered. “You’re in for a __big__  surprise.”

“Anyway,” Benny interrupted, turning back to Dean, “you don’t need to worry about me. I have a lot of experience in moving through terrain covered in snow. The park requires maintaining even during winter, you know.”

Annoyance bubbled right under Dean’s skin, slowly driving him to the brink of anger, but not quite there yet. He stared for a moment at that amused, self-satisfied smile on Benny’s face until he had enough.

“That’s great,” he responded. “Hopefully you’re better at it than taking care of your car.”

And just like that the amusement left Benny’s face much to Dean’s vicious pleasure.

“What are you talking about?” Dad questioned.

“Benny drives a classic, Mazda Rotary Pickup from ’75, but he doesn’t respect it. The paint is covered in cracks and the engine barely worked until I fixed it.”

Understanding washed over Dad’s face. “So __that’s__  what you’ve been doing for past two days.”

“Yep. And once I’m finished, it’ll only require a good painting job to look like new.” Dean glanced back at Benny and nodded courtesy. “You’re welcome, by the way.”

Deep down he realized his reaction was completely overblown and later he was going to regret it, probably even try to make up to Benny somehow for his behavior, but right now he was very pleased with showing that ungrateful asshole his place. At least Benny didn’t try to talk back, instead lowering his eyes in submission and nodding.

“Thank you helping me out with my car, brother,” he said.

Better late than never.

Dean took a step forward to resume their exploration, but froze in place again when he noticed a curious stare his father gave both of them. It only lasted for a couple more seconds before Dad turned around and started walking. What the hell was that supposed to mean?

They continued for fifteen more minutes without uttering another word, the omnipresent silence disturbed only by their heavy breathing and the crunching of snow under their boots. This far away from the main road trees were growing more densely, making it harder to see at larger distances. Dean kept his eyes focused, searching between the trunks and on the ground for any trails, but without luck. He made his absolute best to not glance back at Benny who shadowed him, still annoyed at Alpha’s condescending behavior.

“Found something,” Dad announced suddenly.

Dean hurried to where he and Rufus stood, staring at the ground. He could hear Benny’s quickened footsteps and breathing as he followed suit.

Imprinted in the fresh snow were clear animal trails and Dean needed only one glance to confirm that yeah, those were deer hoof tracks, left by a full-grown beast travelling alone.

“It’s moving west,” Dad noted, then raised his head up and took a deep whiff of air. Dean repeated his action and got a faint, but recent deer scent. “The trail is rather fresh. It came through here an hour ago, maybe two. If we hurry, we might be able to catch up.”

“Let’s not waste time then,” Rufus said in clear excitement.

They followed the trail for the next ten minutes until they reached a small clearing where hoof prints started spiraling around as if the animal walked in circles for a bit. Both Dean and Dad tried to deduce the correct direction based on the scent. However, the sheer cold and the amount of snow dumped their smelling sense enough that it was hardly of any use. They were able to confirm that deer was here recently, but that’s about it.

“Look around,” Dad ordered.

Each of them chose a separate trail to follow. Dean spun left and followed one to the edge of trees, eventually noticing a spot in the snow where the trail took a sharp turn to the right, then after a couple of feet turned back ahead and continued further into the forest. Unsure if the deer chose that road or changed his mind again later, he move ahead to check it out.

That’s when Benny’s voice came from behind: “Dean, I wouldn’t—“

“Keep searching,” Dean interrupted him, glancing over his shoulder. “You don’t need to give me instructions. I have experience in hunting, __you know,__ ” he added, echoing Benny’s earlier words.

Benny shrugged and waved forward, inviting Dean to keep move.

Good. If that Alpha takes him for some amateur—

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACH!!!” Dean shrieked when snow __gave__ under him and he suddenly started __falling__ down, only to stop just as suddenly. His heart hammered somewhere in his throat as he struggled to figure out what happened.

Deep snow.

He had walked into a deep snow pit and sunk up to his waists.

Like a fucking __amateur__.

The sound of rapid crunching brought his attention to the right where his dad sprinted toward him, worry visible on his face. However, it took only one look at his son’s pathetic situation for said worry to morph into pure anger. Even at age of 28 the view of John Winchester mad was intimidating to him.

“Goddamned, Dean!” Dad spat. “Don’t scare me like that!”

“Sorry…,” Dean choked out in embarrassment. He noticed over his father’s shoulder that Rufus was laughing his head off in the distance. “Won’t happen again.”

Together Dad and Benny managed to pull him out of the drift, and with the final annoyed glare Dad walked away to continue examining the trail. Ignoring the hot splotches that spread on his cheeks and neck, Dean bent down to brush the layer of snow from his pants; thankfully, they were made out of a thick material that didn’t soak through easily, otherwise he’d have to abandon the hunt and head back home to avoid catching a cold… like an amateur.

Once he was clean, he straightened back up and quickly checked the rifle to confirm that it was clean. That’s when he noticed Benny’s amused expression.

“Tried to warn you,” the Alpha explained. “But clearly such experienced hunter knows what he’s doing.”

That spiteful bitch.

“Yeah, well,” Dean dismissed. “At least I know how to keep my car in a presentable order.”

Uninterested in interacting anymore with the annoying Alpha, he turned back and resumed following the chosen trail, this time carefully avoiding—

He gasped when something __smacked__  him in the back and clumsily tried to feel for the spot to check out what it was, but couldn't quite reach. Instead he spun around to see Benny finishing another snowball and giving him a challenging look.

“Don’t you __dare!__ ” Dean warned.

Benny paused for a moment, pondering his words.

Then he shrugged and threw the snowball dead center at Dean’s chest. Okay, that was __it__! Dean bolted toward the closest tree and hid behind it right after another shot hit him on the shoulder. He quickly slid the rifle into the leather holder on his back, knelt down and gathered a large portion of snow, mashing it into a sizeable ammunition in his hands. Armed like that, he pressed against the trunk and carefully, barely sticking his nose out, he peeked ahead.

As he expected the attack now, he leaned back, letting the next ball pass by harmlessly and send his own flying through the air. Without even checking if it connected, he started working on the new one.

A carefree chuckle reached his ears. He risked another glance at the forest clearing and saw Rufus standing in the middle of it between the trees he and Benny were using as shields. “Okay, pups,” the Beta said. “Calm down.”

Dad stepped next to him, looking less amused. “Do I have to remind you that we _ _re hunting__  here?” he pointed out. “This isn’t the time to be acting like this. If there’s a deer nearby, the amount of __noise__  you’re making will scare it away. So, how about you stop __this instant__?”

What was Dean supposed to do?

He threw the snowball.

It splashed against Dad’s jacket, leaving a mark on his chest. The Alpha didn’t even budge. He closed his eyes for a moment and raised his face skyward as if praying for patience.

“Did you get it out of your system?” he asked calmly. Then he took a deep breath and shouted: “Will you start acting like freaking ADULTS now?!”

Suddenly, a sound of crunching snow came from afar, dragging their attention to the south where a startled deer flashed between the trees and vanished before any of them could ready a gun.

At the same moment, Dean’s phone vibrated in his pocket. He fished it out and answered the call, keeping his eyes fixed on his dad who looked like he downed an entire bottle of lemon juice.

“What’s up?” Dean said to the speaker.

“Hey, Dean,” Jess responded. “We just shot a deer, so I’m calling to wrap the hunt up. How are you guys doing? You had any luck?”

“Uh… we’ll talk back home.”

 

***

 

The return trip was full of both shame and amusement for all the party members. Rufus in particular kept switching between shaking his head in disappointment and chuckling carefree. “I don’t believe this,” he announced. “Now the old bastard will have the last laugh. I got a chance to hunt with John Winchester only for things to end up like this. I just… seriously… Dammit!” He finished the speech with another chuckle.

His reaction very much mirrored Dean’s, who wasn’t sure how to react to the whole fiasco; in fourteen years he starred in the show and eleven he actively participated in hunts, they never had such an epic screw up and certainly not one caused by Dad himself. However, as they approached the front entrance to the house, he decided to shrug it off and focus on the positive aspect: his childish fight with Benny, which he started out of pettiness, resolved quickly and in a rather fun way. Every time he and Benny looked at each other on the way back, they would smile. There was always an upside to every downturn, he figured.

Sam’s group had already returned by the time they walked inside and several Alpha crew members were carrying a dead deer toward the kitchen. Dean noticed the gunshot on its left side and a deep, precise stab wound in the heart, which Sam surely had done in order to end the animal’s suffering. The big snot always was a softy.

They only had a couple of minutes to shed their winter wear and exchange some words before Ellen joined them in the living room, looking very pleased.

“That was a fast hunt,” she commented. “Saved us an entire day of shooting. Now we have more time to film the interactions between you.”

“I’d love to get a few scenes in the garage with Dean and Ben,” Dad declare, nodding toward the two man in question. “Apparently they’ve been working on Ben’s car for past two days.”

“Good idea.” Ellen nodded and turned toward them. “You don’t have anything against it?”

Dean’s heart sank a little at the thought of cameramen accompanying them around and robbing them of the private moments they shared. He didn’t want it, but the way Dad stared curiously at him back in the forest and right now left no doubt that he couldn’t simply turn it down without giving him the wrong idea.

“I don’t see the point,” Dean lied. “We’re almost done, so there’s not much to film anyway.”

That answer caused Ellen to eye him suspiciously – he never denied them the permission for shooting before, unless he wanted some private moment in his girlfriends’ company – but she dropped the subject and moved to the next point. Dad, however, continued watching him. Dean ignored his stare, feigning high interest in everything Ellen said. Basically, she decided that Dean, Sam and their father should start prepping the deer on the same day to make the storage easier. With that plan set up, Dean used the first opportunity to run away from Dad and hide in the game room to cool down a bit.

He grabbed the darts and threw them around in easy-going manner, still managing to rack up a lot of points. His aim was great even when he didn’t care to kick Sam’s ass.

Speaking of the devil, his brother came after him ten minutes later, stepped closer and outstretched his hand, silently asking Dean to share the darts. He took several good shots on his own. “So, you and Benny?” Sam asked casually.

Either someone told him about their behavior during the hunt or he noticed things on his own. Regardless, Dean decided to play dumb. “What about us?” he asked.

Sam aimed and sent another dart on its way, barely missing the center. Then he glanced at Dean, his unimpressed expression indicating that he saw through Dean’s behavior. “You two have been spending a whole lot of time together.”

“Yeah, he’s a cool guy. He needs to take a better care of his truck, but otherwise,” Dean shrugged, “I don’t have anything against him.”

That admission earned a suspicion glare from Sam.

“Even though he’s an Alpha?” he questioned. “You don’t get along with Alphas.”

“You’re an Alpha,” Dean pointed out as he walked over to the dart board to clean it off, “and we get along just fine.”

“If you don’t count constant pranks and bickering.”

Dean snorted as he collected all the darts Sam drove into the target. Their last Great Prank War took place a mere five months ago and it ended with Sam’s underwear covered in itching powder, which he couldn’t wash off himself even after two showers. And Dean’s classic rock tapes being replaced with a fake ones comprised solely of Taylor Swift’s songs. It didn’t matter how old they actually were, those wars brought their inner pups.

“Well, that’s a brotherly affection for you,” Dean declared. “So you can shut your pie hole, because it isn’t stopping.”

With a theatrically exaggerated flourish Sam moved out of the way and leaned against a wall to watch his brother playing. They both remained silent for a moment as the darts, one by one, hit the target with a loud __snap__. “Dad told me how you and Benny started throwing snowballs at each other during the hunt.” Dean remained silent. “He described it as very __couple-like__.”

“Why don’t you just ask what you want to ask instead of tip-toeing around the issue?” Dean snapped. He was sick of people sticking their noses into his businesses.

“Are you interested in him?”

And there it was, the million dollar question he had no answer for yet. He __liked__  Benny the way he never liked any Alpha, not even Cas, but he didn’t have enough time to figure things out properly. He had no idea if he wanted to pursue anything more serious or if Benny even felt the same way.

So he answered honestly: “I don’t know. I met the guy three days ago.”

“And you’re already fixing his car?” Sam grinned. “Isn’t that something you save for the third date?”

“You really want to end up with itching powder all over your underwear again, don’t you?”

The door clicked behind them. Dean glanced over his shoulder to witness Dad removing his hand from the handle and strolling closer; he was in a good mood, clearly having recovered from their embarrassing hunt.

“I wish you boys would stop fighting with each other,” he requested, but an amused smile danced on his lips. “It certainly would save us money on cleaning detergents.”

“As soon as Sam admits my authority over him,” Dean joked.

“In your dreams, jerk!” the big snot bit back.

“Bitch.”

Dad shook his head, dismissing the subject as a lost cause.

“Anyway, Sam has a point and you should think seriously about dating Ben,” he advised.

That was… __unexpected__ ,only partially because Dad brought it up so randomly. Dean never dated an Alpha nor contemplated doing so before. But since the very first time he ever went out on a date – he still remembered her, Cassie Robinson, a feisty Beta from London who stole his heart and then broke it when she didn’t want to continue their relationship at a long-distance – Dad made it obvious he wasn’t fond of the idea of Dean settling down with an Alpha. Dad never gave a concrete reason for it. However, Dean suspected that it had something more to do with fear. Dad was afraid that an Alpha would separate him from his eldest son. Due to their biology, Alphas were able to influence their Omega mates to a greater degree than any other gender. For all Dean’s bravado, he realized he wouldn’t be exempt from it. Screaming and ordering him around wouldn’t work, that’s for certain, but despite the stereotype of Alphas exclusively using sheer power to get their way, they could also achieve things through emotional manipulation. The same was Omegas do. Sam was __very__  good at looking like a kicked pup when he really wanted to pressure Dean into doing something.

Bringing another Alpha into the family when the two Winchester Alphas were already frequently butting heads meant additional problems. That’s what made Dad’s words so surprising to Dean. Clearly, it was the last events that changed his tune.

“You know, in some circles it’s considered __rude__  to eavesdrop,” Sam sneered.

“I wasn’t eavesdropping,” Dad denied in a strained voice. “I caught the last few things you two said when I came in the room. Control yourself, Sam.”

Dean groaned internally. Not __another__  argument. The two of them were pretty bad about starting fights before - as was normal with Alphas - but after the events from several months ago Sam was apparently __looking__  for opportunities to get on Dad’s nerves. Even Jess’s soothing influence did little to calm him down.

As usual, he stepped in to ease the tension by returning to the main subject: “For now I’m letting things develop on their own. If things go right… then yeah, maybe I will start dating him.”

“They already seem to be going that way,” Dad stated. “If you two mated—“

“It’s __way__  too soon to be talking about it!”

“I was just going to say…” Dad paused and swallowed with difficulty as if something got stuck in his throat. His natural scent of old leather, mint and apples changed, as if drenched in water. “After your mother died, all I wanted was to see you two happy. And being mated to her gave me the happiest moments of my life.”

Dean lowered his eyes to the darts he held in his hands. “Those aren’t the parts I remember.”

He had only vague memories of his mother, some detached images of her smiling that meant little to him. What would always be engrained into his memories were the numerous nights after the fire when Sam would start crying in his crib and Dad would scoop him up, hold him close and murmur that it was __okay__ , they were __safe__  and that Daddy will always be there to protect him. Even though Dad tried to keep his back turned, his broken voice betrayed his anguish each time. The few times he faced Dean, who quietly laid in the motel bed, the Omega saw tears in his eyes, shinning in the pale light of the night light.

His entire life Dean heard countless morons calling Alphas Neanderthals who lack any compassion or consideration for others - especially Omegas. That Alphas saw Omegas as nothing more than objects to use. These assholes didn’t witness what Dean saw, the Alpha struggling to raise his pups after the mating bond with his Omega was broken.

Dean glanced toward Sam and noticed that his brother lost all will in starting a fight. In the end Sammy got the short end of the stick. He never got to even __meet__ Mom. And worse, his earliest memories of Dad came from the time when the Alpha was in a deep emotional mess. “ _ _Alpha vs. Wilderness__ ” was an absolute __godsend__  that reignited Dad’s passion for life. Dean will never forget the smile on his father’s face when the show became a hit. It was the first genuine smile he gave since his mom died and the first opportunity for Sam to witness their father in a better state.

“I’ll see how things turn out between me and Benny,” Dean promises in the end.

“Alright.” Dad nodded and breathed in deeply to calm himself down. “The crew’s preparing an early dinner for us. It’ll be ready in half an hour.”

“Thanks for letting us know,” Sam responded in softer tone.

After Dad left, they returned to playing darts, but Dean’s thoughts were in turmoil, bouncing from the painful memories of his childhood to Benny’s calming presence. Yeah, he should have a talk with Benny.


	5. Sad Truth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Originally, this chapter was suppose to take place in a more classically romantic environment: on the back deck of Winchesters' house with Benny and Dean watching the snow fall. However, I realized that accidentally I turned the garage into "their" place, so I relocated the scene there. Hope you enjoy it and agree with the change!

The engine roared as Dean repeatedly pushed the accelerator down and released it.

“Can you hear how __smoothly__  it works now?” the Omega asked, turning to Benny and flashing a bright smile.

Although Benny hadn’t noticed anything out of ordinary in his truck’s work before, he did recognize how much steadier it sounded and acknowledged that with a nod.

Dean turned the car off, got out and handed the keys back to Benny.

“Now you only need a new paint job like I said earlier, and she’s going to be fine,” Dean summarized. “Take good care of her and in return she’ll serve you well for years. Plus, makes everyone jealous.” He shut the door and crossed his arms over his chest, giving Benny a serious look. “Counting the parts and the labor, you owe me fifteen hundred bucks.”

Benny froze in place, only able to stare at the Omega in shock. __Fifteen hundred bucks__?! He didn’t have that kind of money!

It was Dean’s cheerful laughter that knocked him out of the shock. “I’m __kidding__!” Dean admitted, still giggling. “What kind of asshole d’you think I am? First forcing you into letting me fix the car, then making you pay for it? God, you should have __seen__ the look on your face!”

Despite his wounded pride, Benny also chuckled.

“That was just a shocking amount of money to ask for a car fix,” he pointed out.

“Pretty standard for fixing a classic,” Dean informed him, shrugging.

“Seriously?”

“Well, if you want it done __right__ , which is the only way __I__  approve of.” Dean sauntered to the work bench where various tools were scattered, some of them covered in oil. “Either go all out or go home, that’s my policy.”

Benny leaned against the side of his truck and watched as the Omega started cleaning the tools with an old rag. “You could make a living out of working exclusively on classics.”

“Yeah. In the past I pondered the idea of doing it as a serious business.”

“Why didn't you?” Benny hedged.

“Because the show leaves me little time for myself, let alone additional responsibilities.”

There was a barely concealed bitterness in Dean’s voice, which brought memories of Sam’s words Benny overheard on the first day of shooting: ‘ _ _I’m so sick of this! Even here we can’t have a moment of privacy!’__  It seemed that both brothers had some negative feelings toward the show and Benny wanted to ask Dean for clarification, but hesitated. The fact that Dean actually wanted to spend time with him and enjoyed doing so was much more than he realistically expected to get during the stay. He didn’t want to ruin it by poking nose into Dean’s private matters. They hardly knew each other after all. Hanging together for four days doesn’t give him any right.

So instead he watched as Dean cleaned the dirty tools and put them back into a toolbox. The Omega worked fast but with a precision that spoke of years-long experience. Benny easily imagined him tending to classic cars in his own repair shop, showing the same passion and enthusiasm he had when merely having an option to work on Benny’s old truck.

“Have you… ever considered leaving?” Benny threw out.

Dean’s movements faltered and he glanced at him.

“It’s a family business,” he noted as if that was enough of an answer.

“Doesn’t mean you’re chained to it for life. You were what, fourteen-years-old when it premiered and you started appearing in it on the virtue of being the host’s son? After all this time you’re allowed to want different things, Dean.”

For a moment the Omega studied him with a hard to read expression, but then Dean’s scent became sour, betraying his nervousness. He eventually turned back to the table and finished packing the tools, giving a clear message that he wasn’t interested in continuing the subject. Benny got the hint and let it drop.

The shooting for the day had finished two hours ago, so they didn’t need to go back yet. Instead Dean pulled out a bottle of eggnog he had grabbed before leaving for the garage and poured two cups to the brim, handing one to Benny. The first sip was a surprise – yep, it was definitely the version with alcohol – but he quickly grew to enjoy the strong underline of whisky that spread a nice warmth through his body. When Dean sat on the Impala’s hood, Benny joined him, both remaining silent as they continued sipping their drinks. Classic rock played from inside the car, the front doors wide open to make it more audible. Benny recognized the song as “ _ _Thank you__ ” by Led Zeppelin.

This easy atmosphere was a nice change of pace from the clutter that was the shooting. Maybe that’s why Dean sought it out? Benny had to bear it for only a week, while Dean __lived__  with it for past fourteen years.

Earlier they’d been trapped in the kitchen since one pm. Seven hours of watching as John, Dean and Sam prepped the deer, cutting the skin off, gutting it out and chopping the meat into pieces. In order to prevent the game from spoiling, the room was properly chilled ahead of time, so everyone had to wear thicker clothes to stay warm. It was uncomfortable and frankly __boring__ , just sitting on a chair while the Winchesters explained to the camera which parts were edible and which had to be thrown away. Afterwards they went to the dining room and consumed a late dinner, then were free for the remainder of the evening. Benny was exhausted from the amount of __nothing__  he did the whole day and just __itched__  to go out to the garage, so he happily jumped at the opportunity when Dean offered it despite the late hour. It was nearing ten and he wasn’t tired yet. The eggnog made him a little lethargic, though.

Dean’s voice returned him to the present: “Is there, uh, someone waiting for you back home, buddy?” He turned his head toward Benny, but he wouldn’t quite meet the Alpha’s eyes. “A cute Omega? Or Beta? You don’t smell mated, but maybe you’re dating someone?”

“No, there’s no one,” Benny admitted, wondering where Dean was heading with that question. “Why?”

“Well, I just… I thought…” Dean opened and closed his mouth several times, but no more words came out. Finally, he chuckled and swiped the right palm over his face. “Goddamned, look at me. I slept with more women than I can remember and yet here I am, stumbling through my words like a virgin. Fucking embarrassing.”

Benny stared at the Omega as his mind rushed to make sense of what was going on.

Was Dean trying to…?

No, no, that’s __ridiculous__. Stop getting stupid ideas.

“I’m asking,” Dean continued, “because I enjoy hanging around with you and I wondered if we could, you know, meet up sometime once the shooting ends? Maybe go out for a beer. That would be awesome.”

Benny’s heart faltered for a second after this offer, only to resume its beating at doubled speed, pumping blood that felt hotter than usual through his body. He was right. Dean was __asking him out__.

This was __everything__  he dreamed of and yet all he could do was to stare, utterly dumbstruck, anticipating the inevitable punch line. Because Dean __had__  to be joking. These type of situations happened in romantic comedies, not real life.

But as the time passed on, Dean remained silent, waiting for his answer. It slowly dawned on Benny that yes, he was being serious and has just asked him out on a date. Benny breathed deeply, feeling a sudden lightness in his lungs as if a large weight rested on his chest for past three years and was lifted up when Dean spoke. The corner of his lips twitches in a shy smile and he saw Dean returning it more confidently…

Only for said smile to vanish in an instant, followed by Dean’s, when reality crushed onto him. He couldn’t say yes. He was __broken__  and this amazing Omega deserved better. It would be selfish to lead Dean on.

Benny averted his eyes. “I don’t think that’s a good idea,” he said and ignored his heart’s anguish. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” Dean responded, shrugging. “It was just an idea I had.” However, despite his casual tone, Dean’s scent turned sodden with sadness. “Should have known you wouldn’t be interested in me,” he added quieter.

“What are you talking about?” Benny questioned in surprise.

“Come on, Benny, __look__  at me! I’m way too tall and muscular for an Omega! Alphas prefer smaller partners!”

“Cher, this isn’t about—“

“You don’t have to explain yourself. I understand. Forget I asked.”

Dean slumped down and took several gulps of eggnog, avoiding Benny’s gaze. He kept neutral expression, but his scent was soaked in misery, coming across as a sodden apple pie.

 _ _Crap.__  Benny didn’t want to explain the truth to Dean and reveal the painful story of his failures, but if he remained silent, Dean would believe he was at fault here and that wasn’t an option. He __won’t__  allow other people, especially someone as kind and generous as Dean, to suffer over something he did. He fully expected Dean to lose all respect he had for the Alpha, but if it meant keeping Dean from pursuing such worthless man as him, then so be it.

Bracing himself for the task, Benny downed the glass of eggnog, which burned his throat. He would need that. Alcohol was the __only__  thing that got him through the first several months after the breakup with Andrea.

“I had a crush on you since I started watching the show three years ago,” he revealed. Slowly Dean turned to stare at him, eyes wide in surprise. “I can’t describe how __excited__  I was to finally be able to meet you. So trust me, your date offer means a lot to me.”

“Then why…?” Dean paused, letting the question hang in the air.

“Because I’m a horrible mate. The last person I tried to build a relationship with… her name was Andrea… I made her absolutely miserable and I don’t want to hurt another person the same way.”

A glimmer of doubt flashed in Dean’s eyes as he gave Benny a once over.

“I haven’t noticed anything so god-awful about you that would make me miserable,” he said.

Well, there was no turning back. He had to make Dean understand.

“Me and Andrea met six years ago at a parking lot in Litchfield County, my home town,” Benny recounted. Through the narrow window high up the garage wall he watched as snowflakes danced in the wind, illuminated by pale moonlight. Back then it also snowed. “She had troubles starting her car, so I helped her out. You should have seen her. She was gorgeous.” He still could easily recall every line that creased her face, the dark color of her long hair that she kept hanging loose at all times. And those lips he used to kiss reverently… but now the image carried a jab of pain in his heart along with it. “I asked her on a date and she agreed. Over the next six months we moved in together and everything was well. At least at first.

Soon my habits started bothering her. You should know by now I’m the type of guy who goes out for a walk as a hobby and values peace above all else. She preferred going out to bars with her friends, drinking and dancing ‘til morning. I saw how much it troubled her, so I started accompanying her. But it was too much. The endless noise and chaos gave me constant headaches, and the amount of alcohol Andrea and her friends drank made me sick. Despite putting a good face to a bad game, I couldn’t force myself to enjoy those nights and eventually Andrea saw through my act. She told me to stop following her around, because I ruined her fun and that I’m not a __real__  Alpha. She was right. I’m not a real Alpha.”

Smelling a faint scent of burning coal in Dean’s natural aroma, Benny hunched down. It was working. The Omega finally started realizing how much of a __failure__  he was. He slowly turned to Dean, giving an apologetic smile.

“What kind of Alpha can’t meet their mate’s expectations?” Benny added.

“I don’t have much experience in relationships,” Dean admitted. “My longest one was with Lisa and it lasted only six months. But I know relationships are about mutual happiness, not one person sacrificing everything for the other. Did Andrea ever try to do stuff __you__  like?”

That was such a __ridiculous__  notions he shook his head in disbelief. Alphas were the ones responsible for proving their worth as a mate to the Omegas, not the other way around. He learned this simple fact back in the orphanage when he was only seven years old and in anger threw a toy soldier at a fellow orphan, an Omega boy. Their caretakers instantly put him in his room, forbidding him from leaving for the rest of the day. Benny tried to explain that the other boy had repeatedly kicked him and it really hurt, but he was told that he wasn’t allowed to hit an Omega because he was an Alpha and only __bad__  Alphas raised their hands on the weak, and it didn’t matter if he was attacked.

Over the years he learned that Omegas gave Alphas’ lives a purpose, so they had to be cherished and protected at all times. After he left the orphanage to start a life on his own, the world outside only proved those things to be true. Everywhere he looked, he saw images of Alphas proving their worth to their mates and anyone who stepped out of the line was shunned. Only failures like him couldn’t keep an Omega satisfied.

Dean took his headshake as a sign to continue: “She doesn’t sound like a particularly good mate. __Nobody__  can be expected to meet all of her demands.”

“Other Alphas could,” Benny disclaimed.

A long stretch of silence stopped their conversation. Slowly the scent of burning coal polluting Dean’s aroma became stronger as the Omega growled: “What?”

Benny’s throat squeezed tightly, making it harder for him to get a word out. This was the __worst__ part, his __biggest__  failure, that he had to admit to, but he ventured so far he had to finish now.

“Since I wasn’t able to give her the things she wanted, she started seeing other Alphas.”

“She was __cheating__  on you because you didn’t like going to bars?!” Dean spat out. “Tell me you kicked her ass out!”

Dean’s outrage shook Benny to the core. Why wasn’t the Omega angry at __him__ , the __true__  root of the problem, instead of Andrea? If he was __better__ , tried __harder__ , none of this would have happened.

The most baffling part, however, was the fact that back when Andrea cheated on him on the first few occasions, he held a similar mindset to Dean’s. He was __furious__ and believed that Andrea had no right to go behind his back. He tried to end things between them, promising himself on every turn that this was the __last__  time he allowed her to hurt him like that. But it didn’t matter in the end. With a few tender words, soft kisses and apologies Andrea always managed to snake her way back into his heart. In the beginning he figured that she just made a mistake and they could move past it. Over time he understood that she wasn’t a problem, but __he__  was. And if he was a better mate, Andrea wouldn’t indulge in affairs. ‘ _ _Stop staring at me with those sad eyes!__ ’ she’d scream on several occasions. ‘ _ _It makes me feel like a whore! If you stepped up and been an Alpha for once, I wouldn’t have to go out each night to get hook up with other guys! At least they know how to have fun, you worthless piece of shit!’__

“She blamed me for the whole thing,” Benny revealed, feeling his eyes getting wetter. __Dammit__ , he thought he was past crying. “And she was right.”

And then she broke up with him when she couldn’t stand it anymore. He spent the next several months drinking heavily to dull out the pain in his chest until the chief of the Park Rangers told him that if he showed up drunk at work ever again, he’d lose his job. Lenore __begged__  him to cut back on alcohol, maybe even join some group for support, and he felt like shit for making her miserable, so he followed through with her request. Benny set a limit to one bottle of whisky per week, eventually getting back on track. The pain didn’t disappear, but he managed to fight it back by watching “ _ _Alpha vs. Wilderness__ ”, particularly the beautiful Omega who sat right next to him.

The snowflakes continued swirling behind the window in hypnotizing dance. Benny stared at them, hating how sore his throat felt and how wet his eyes were. He didn’t deserve to be cried over.

“She really fucked with your mind,” Dean decided. Benny felt a hand delicately dragging him by the chin and guiding his head toward the Omega. “Dude, you’re the best goddamned Alpha I’ve ever met. Everyone else tries to dominate the hell out of me, even Sam, which drives me insane. __That’s__  why I don’t date Alphas. You don’t do that. But at the same time you don’t allow anyone to walk over you. When I acted like a dick during the hunt, you fought back.”

Dean’s words cut into Benny’s heart like a knife, but strangely enough, it felt good as if Dean attempted to let out a poison that was stuck inside for past three years. The stench of burning coal slowly evaporated, replaced by sweeter smell of honey: a sympathetic and affectionate one.

He didn’t quite believe Dean, but he wanted to remain in this headspace for longer, free from the misery that became a constant element in his life. Over the course of only three days Dean made him feel such a wide array of emotions he almost forgot existed. One moment he was nervous about making an ass of himself in front of the Omega, the next he was annoyed at Dean. And now… for the first time in three years he felt __alive__.

For a couple of wonderful seconds Dean held his gaze, but then lowered his eyes, the previous smell of wetness and a new one of vinegar – regret and pain – polluted his natural aroma.

“You shared something so intimate with me,” Dean pointed out. “Guess it’s only fair to do the same myself.”

Benny was quick to protest: “You don’t have to—“

“I know. I __want__  to.”

Dean played with a half-empty glass of eggnog in his hand, swirling the liquid around. He jumped of the Impala’s hood and the car shook under Benny as Dean walked over to the garage window. This time the silence stretched for so long Benny was sure Dean changed his mind and wouldn’t speak after all, but finally his voice came, strained with held back emotions.

“I’m not sure how to say this to not make myself look like a bigger freak than I already am, but…” Dean glanced timidly at Benny, acting so differently from his usual cocky self. “Do you want to have pups?”

“Yes,” Benny confirmed. “Always dreamed of having a big family of my own.”

Dean nodded and turned back toward the window. “I wanted them for the longest time, probably since I was a pup myself. You probably know my family’s history, everyone does. Hard to hide those things when you’re constantly in a spotlight and people are following your every step.”

Sam’s broken voice once again echoed in Benny’s mind: ‘ _ _I’m so sick of this! Even here we can’t have a moment of privacy!__ ’

“Anyway,” Dean continued, “when we lived abroad, Dad spent most of his time working two, sometimes three shifts a day to support us, so taking care of Sammy often fell on my shoulders. I was the one who taught him how to tie shoes, cook and clean around the house, heck, even how to wipe his own ass.” Dean chuckled, but quickly returned to being serious. “Back then he looked at me like I was some sort of superhero. I miss that feeling of accomplishment. That’s probably what made me desperate to have pups myself. And not just raising them. Getting pregnant, having them growing inside me, the whole process.”

“Why didn’t you do that then?” Benny asked, scowling.

“Never met anyone capable of knocking me up who’d make me interested in settling down.” Dean flashed Benny a grin. “Until now, that is.”

Benny coughed to hide the embarrassment at Dean’s bold words, which judging by the Omega’s expression didn’t work. Despite hearing the truth about his failed relationship with Andrea, Dean wasn’t discouraged in the slightest and now he was making a blatant suggestion about them __sleeping together__.

However, the boldness vanished slowly from Dean’s face as he resumed the story: “I tried starting something with my buddy, Cas. Everyone kept saying we have undeniable chemistry and we should hook up. Personally, we don’t see it, but eight months ago we were drinking, got a little buzzed and decided to find out how compatible we’re in bed. It was fucking __awkward__. Afterward we promised to never speak of that night again.”

A flash of jealousy rushed through Benny at the idea of another Alpha sleeping with Dean, but he took a deep breath and ignored it. Dean just admitted they had no interest in taking it any further and treated the whole situation as a mistake.

“Is this tied to your story?” he asked.

“Actually, it is,” Dean confirmed. “A month later I started having very telling symptoms: constant fatigue, sleeping for longer than usual, morning sicknesses.” Benny’s heart skipped a beat as if he missed a step while walking down the staircase, realizing exactly what Dean was saying. “Then my heat didn’t come. Three weeks later it slowly dawned on me that,” Dean’s voice faltered briefly “I was pregnant.”

His words hanged in the air as a nagging thought slowly appeared in Benny’s head: if Dean caught with a pup almost nine months ago, where was the pup? Dean clearly wasn’t pregnant anymore.

“I was so happy,” Dean said, his voice suddenly hollow. The wetness and vinegar in his scent grew stronger, filling the garage with stench of misery. “Dad insisted I go to see a doctor and make sure the pup was okay, but I had more important things to do. Like nesting or choosing names. I picked Victoria for a girl, because it sounds badass, and Marlon after Marlon Brando for a boy. The symptoms continued for the next several months, until I finally decided to be responsible and go to a doctor as my Dad requested, and…” Dean stopped as his voice finally refused to cooperate under emotions. Tears filled his eyes, threatening to spill out any moment.

Benny didn’t even realize when he left the Impala’s hood and came to stand right next to the Omega. He struggled to come up with something to say as the pure misery in Dean’s scent attacked his nose. Every attempt at speaking ended up in him choking on the lump that was stuck in his throat.

“I’m sorry,” he eventually managed, speaking barely audible. “I’m sorry you lost your pup.”

To his shock Dean __burst into laughter__.

He took a step back, listening to the hysterical giggles that echoed around the garage and watching the tears finally streaming down Dean’s cheeks. It took a good minute for the Omega to calm down enough to speak. “There was no pup to lose, Benny.”

“I… I’m not following you.”

Dean wiped his face with the sleeve of his shirt, sniffling. Despite the fit of laughter, he looked like a wreck, his eyes swollen and nose red.

“The doctor used a term ‘ _ _delusional pregnancy__ ’,” he recalled bitterly, remembering the papers hidden in his desk drawer in his room. “It’s a rare condition when someone experiences all symptoms of pregnancy despite not actually being pregnant. Apparently, it mostly happens to people who __desperately__  want to have pups. Omegas in particular are likely to suffer from it due to our heats.”

With that Dean went quiet again, allowing Benny’s numb-from-shock mind to start processing all the information.

Dean never got pregnant, he only believed himself to be and spent four months preparing for the pup’s arrival, picking names and imagining the wonderful time he’ll—

 _ _Jesus__.

Although Benny was shocked by what he’d heard, he couldn’t stop a nagging thought: “If you want to have pups so much, why don’t you?”

“Did you watch the show?” Dean asked in return and immediately Benny remembered the last episode that aired before his arrival, one where Dean had to wrestle with an alligator that got too close to a cameraman, fully intending to kill the man. It was only Dean’s intervention that saved his life. “I can’t carry a pup with all the stunts that are going on. The hunting is too dangerous to have pregnant people around.”

“You could leave.” Nudged by a sudden spurt of courage he added: “You seem to want to anyway.”

Dean’s expression hardened and for a moment Benny was afraid he stepped too far.

“Doesn’t matter what I want,” Dean announced, taking him by surprise again. “Dad won’t let me leave.”

“He can’t tell you what to do,” Benny noted.

“It’s not that simple. Mom’s death was a huge blow to Dad and then our grandparents tried to take us away, making it clear they wouldn’t let him see us again.” Benny gasped in shock. The history of John’s tragic past and the dispute he had with his mate’s parents was widely known, but this… The Campbells wanted to prevent John from ever visiting his pups? “I don’t think he ever got over it. Every time me or Sam suggested we’d like to quit the show and start our own lives, he’d do anything in his power to stop us. When Sam wanted to study at Stanford, Dad would constantly start fights, accusing him of turning on the family, until he managed to wear Sam out. Then Sam mated with Jess and before either could even mention leaving, Dad offered Jess a position of PR manager to tie her close to the show.” A faint smirk appeared on Dean’s mouth. “She wasn’t happy when she found out the truth, but stayed for Sam’s sake.”

Benny clenched his teeth as all puzzle pieces finally fell into their rightful place.

To think that John Winchester, the man who constantly spoke about the importance of family, treated his own children in such manipulative fashion boiled Benny’s blood. He recalled an incident during the first meeting with the Winchesters when John announced that Jessica would start making regular appearance on the show and Sam reacted in anger. Back then he couldn’t understand Sam’s reaction. Now he did. John clearly hadn’t discussed the matter with either of them before deciding it was going to happen, because that’s what he desired. Whatever happened in the past didn't give him the right to treat them like this. In fact, it made him no better than the Campbells.

“Don’t be angry at him,” Dean begged.

“It’s not easy,” Benny said, barely holding back a growl raising in his throat.

A calloused hand pressed against his cheek and gently guided his head toward the Omega before him. They stood so close to each other, Benny felt Dean’s breath brushing on his face.

“I know,” Dean admitted. “I’ve been angry at him for so long, but he just wants to keep our family together, what little is left of it.” He gave out a sniffle and chuckled bitterly. “I’m such an idiot, ain’t I? Crying over a pup that was never real to begin with.”

“Don’t see anything stupid in it,” Benny said.

The silence was comfortable as they stared into each other eyes, Benny taking in every seconds.

This was the culmination of all his fantasies he’d never expected to come true. He stood before Dean Winchester, his arms enveloping the Omega in a strong hold. He could feel Dean’s warmth, the softness of his body, the scratch of his five o’clock shadow and that enticing smell, colored with arousal.

And the sweet taste of Dean’s lips…


	6. Breaking Point

The next morning Benny woke up on his own at half past six, feeling refreshed and ready to start a day. He’s slept better than he had in years and at first couldn’t recall what put him in such a good mood. But as he laid in the darkness under thick comforter, allowing his body to slowly catch up to his mind, the memories of previous evening started returning to him in steady waves.

The soft, almost shy kiss he shared with Dean that neither of them cared to take any further. The return trip to the house under shower of snowflakes, quiet and relaxed. And finally the moment when they climbed the stairs, strolled down the hallway and said goodnight to each other before going to their separate rooms. Benny felt no disappointment at their separation, because everything that happened – from working on his car, through sharing painful secrets to that sweet moment of intimacy – was sheer perfection.

And to think that he almost turned down the opportunity to come here due to hurt pride. He’ll have to somehow thank Lenore for submitting his name into the competition. Without her he’d be still wailing in his misery, instead of…

God, he didn’t even __know__  what was actually going on between him and Dean nor if they had a future, but the fact that it was a __possibility__  meant a world to him.

After fifteen minutes of reminiscing and smiling to himself like a teenager who finally kissed his crush, he got up, made the bed and dressed up, pulling his newest and best looking clothes. He quickly used bathroom and confirmed that his beard still didn’t require a trimming. He was done by the time Rufus emerged from his bedroom and with a greeting nod toward the older man, he descended the stairs.

As it came to be expected by now, Jessica and Sam were already in the kitchen, just beginning to work on the breakfast, which consisted of sausage, fried eggs and toasts. The moment they noticed Benny, they exchanged those types of looks that couples share whenever they communicate without words and gave him identical, friendly smiles.

He had an idea what they were thinking about and a flash of nervousness went through his body.

“Good morning,” Sam greeted. “Sleep well?”

“As a matter of fact, I did.” Benny confirmed and ventured to the coffee machine to fix himself a drink.

“I sure hope so. You and Dean returned very late last night.”

“Is your car ready yet?” Jessica questioned, staring at him and ignoring sausage sizzling on the frying pan.

“Yes,” Benny confirmed. “Dean did an amazing job on it.”

“He always knew his way around cars,” Sam summarized. “He didn’t annoy the hell out of you, though, did he? My brother can be difficult to get along with.”

“No, we were doing __great__.”

The words slipped from his mouth before his mind managed to catch up and too late he realized his mistake. Sam and Jessica’s smiles widened and they exchanged another, __knowing__  look. Benny turned away from them and focused on the coffee pouring into his mug as if it was the most fascinating thing in the world, trying to hide his embarrassment.

Over the next twenty minutes others started gathering in the kitchen, filling it with sleepy chatter, the sounds of utensils scraping on the plates, and their natural scents.

Knowing what Benny knew now, it was awkward for him to see John Winchester, particularly the casual way he and Sam talked as if there was no animosity between them. Benny still felt sympathy for John – fate __ripping__  your mate away in such cruel manner, then her parents blame you for the whole incident and try to permanently take your pups away… that would fuck with everyone’s head – but he couldn’t help a thorn of resentment toward the man that lodged itself into his heart. Each time he saw John laugh carefree at someone’s joke, he remembered Dean’s tearful confession and had to focus all of his strength to not slam his fist onto the table. It wouldn’t resolve anything, even if startling John gave him a short burst of satisfaction.

Dean was the last person to enter the kitchen and he faltered in the entrance. They stared at each other for what felt like an eternity to the Alpha, but was probably just a couple of seconds. A gooey smile brightened Dean’s face and Benny felt his mouth stretch in a similar manner.

“Morning, Benny.”

“Good morning, Dean.”

That’s all they said, because nothing more had to be added. Dean grabbed a plate for himself and sat at the table to eat. Nobody paid attention to their short interaction, which gave it a sensation of intimacy.

Except for John, as it turned out. His and Benny’s eyes met for a brief moment before John returned to eating his breakfast. Benny didn’t like the satisfied expression on John’s face.

After everyone was full they headed to the game room before the shoot and had makeup applied. Then, they moved to the living room while the crew members prepared the kitchen for the day’s shooting. The entire day was dedicated to John cooking the unfortunate deer with the help from his sons and the contestants. Because it required more precision on their part, Ellen gave each of them instruction on what they should do. She completely ignored the cameramen hovering around and filming them already in hopes of catching something worth showing on TV. Over the past few days Benny got better about not staring straight into the lenses, but was still self-conscious and instinctively stiffened whenever he spotted a camera aimed at him.

Half an hour later a crew members informed Ellen that everything was set up.

“Alright,” she said, clasping her hands. “Let’s move to the kitchen! Chop, chop! Let’s get the show going.”

Benny got up and followed everyone out of the living room, stepping aside in the entrance to avoid Sam and Jessica who were paused there to quickly clarify their involvement in the shooting with Ellen.

“Hold on!” John said suddenly.

Benny paused right in the threshold and turned around, but John was looking at his son and daughter-in-law.

“Look where you’re standing,” John instructed them, clearly pleased with something.

Confused by his comment, Sam and Jessica searched around, spotting nothing out of ordinary. Their eyes widened in surprise when they glanced up and Benny followed their stares to see mistletoe hanging above their heads from the doorframe. Sam slowly tore his gaze from the green decoration and gave John unimpressed glare.

“Seriously?” he spat.

“It’s a tradition,” John reminded unaffected by his son’s behavior. “You have to kiss.”

Annoyance deepened on Sam’s face and Jessica brushed his arm with her right hand as if she was calming down a startled animal.

Clearly sensing upcoming storm, Dean stepped closer, flashing his teeth in a grin.

“Come on, Sammy,” he interjected. “Don’t tell me you need to be talked into kissing your own mate.”

When Sam lowered his eyes at Jessica, she jumped at the opportunity and said: “Should I feel offended about it?”

Slowly Sam’s expression softened and annoyance was replaced by exasperation, then acceptance. He enveloped Jessica and pressed close to her.

“Fine,” he agreed. “But remember I’m only doing it for you.”

With cameras filming the whole thing, Sam leaned down and gently kissed Jessica, holding their lips pressed together for a long time. Benny smelled pure happiness seeping from their combined scents. Out of curiosity he checked on Becky who stared in a different direction, tightlipped.

Eventually the two lovers separated, gasping for air. Jessica looked straight into a camera and joked: “I can already hear thousands of hateful comments being typed.”

Sam chuckled. “You’re amazing,” he commented.

“I know.” Then she added mischievously: “You could use a little work though.”

For a moment Sam watched her with his left eyebrow raised.

Then in a quick motion he removed his arms from around Jessica and grabbed onto her waists, tickling mercilessly. “Sam, what…?!” was all Jessica managed to get out before an uncontrollable fit of laughter overtook her voice. She tried to back away, but Sam followed her every step. When Jessica’s legs hit a couch, they both toppled over in a clutter of limbs. Jessica grabbed a pillow and threw it at Sam, only for it to harmlessly bounce away and land on the floor. They remained like that, giggling from time to time, as Jessica struggled to catch her breath again. Her face was flushed red.

Under any other circumstances Benny would have found this display of affection adorable – though he’d be damned if he ever admitted it out loud – but the fact that Sam clearly didn’t want to use his relationship as a cheap trick for the show __and__  had to be cajoled into kissing Jess, soured Benny’s feelings. Sam’s words rang through Benny’s head again, “ _ _Even__   _ _here__   _ _we__   _ _can’t__   _ _have__   _ _a__   _ _moment__   _ _of__   _ _privacy!__ ”

Now that he knew the truth about John Winchester’s obsessively dependent nature toward his family, he wasn’t able to enjoy the “ _ _fun__ ” moments anymore. It was just like Jessica said on the first day of shooting _ _, ‘once you see how everything looks behind the screen, the show loses its charm.’__

The rest of the day went smoothly. They remained in the kitchen until 9PM, watching John prepare three different meals with deer meat: a simple stew, soup, and meatballs, all of which produced a mouth-watering aroma. As it turned out, John was as skilled at being a chief as he was a hunter. Thankfully, the shooting was more comfortable than the previous day, because the kitchen was warmed up properly. In addition Benny actually got to __do__  something, even if it was merely chopping and seasoning vegetables. It was better than idly sitting around with thumbs up his ass watching the Winchesters work on the deer. He and Dean didn’t have much opportunity to speak, but he didn’t mind. Their close proximity was enough for Benny and whenever he looked at Dean, the soft smile he received in return confirmed that Dean felt the same way.

By the time cameras stopped rolling, it was long dark outside. Benny looked out the kitchen window thoughtfully, only able to see a few feet surrounding the opening – the area merely being illuminated by the kitchen lights; past that, the world was inky black.

Dean yawned and stretched, raising his arms above his head. “I’m beat,” he murmured. “I think I’m gonna call it a night.”

A stab of disappointment flashed through Benny’s heart, but he said nothing. They wouldn’t get to spend any time together. The alpha decided however that it was more important for Dean to rest properly. Though his mood __did__  brighten a little when Dean winked at him on his way out of the kitchen.

Benny figured he would stay up a bit longer and hang around with others, maybe try out the pool table he spotted in the game room.

Much to his surprise Sam walked over to him before he could leave the kitchen. “Hey, Benny. How are you doing?” he greeted. They hadn’t spoken much in past days either because Becky clung to Sam or Sam was nowhere to be found – probably hiding away from the contestants. He didn’t think much of it before – too preoccupied with Dean – but now understood why Sam would keep to himself. It was curious that he decided to approach Benny now.

“Good,” Benny assured. “Thanks for asking.”

“The experience lived up to your expectations?” Sam questioned.

Benny couldn’t stop a quick glance toward the kitchen door where Dean disappeared a moment ago and a twitch of smile on his lips. No, it utterly __shattered__  them. “You could say that,” he agreed finally.

In response Sam gave him a strange look as if he wasn’t sure what Benny was talking about. Slowly an understanding washed over his face.

__Oh, crap._ _

“Really?” Sam probed, but there was no doubt in his voice. “So tell me, precisely whichpart of the show you enjoy the most?”

 _ _Shit.__  

Benny lost his voice, unsure what to say, heat flashed up and around his neck and his heart lurched. Should he deny Sam’s suspicions? Sam had spent several days being harassed by an obsessive fan, so he might not take kindly to Benny’s interest in his brother. His __Omega__  brother, no less.

On the other hand, Jessica also used to be his fan, didn’t she?

Regardless of his denial, Sam already knew the truth. Benny decided to set things straight. “I won’t try forcing myself on Dean. I’ll be happy if Dean chooses to continue seeing me after the shooting…”

Sam silenced him with a chuckle and a raised hand.

“Dean doesn’t need my protection,” he assured. “He might be an Omega, but he’s a tough guy.”

“You aren’t gonna give me the ‘ _ _if you hurt him, I’ll hurt you__ ’ speech?”

“Trust me, Dean can take care of that himself.”

It was hard to believe an Alpha had no intention of acting protective toward an Omega, especially his own sibling, as such impulses were deeply ingrained in Alpha instincts. Even Benny sometimes felt a need to step in and give a warning growl when Lenore or another park ranger struggled with a troublesome visitor. And yet Sam’s scent remained calm, betraying no ill faith against Benny, so he must’ve been telling the truth.

“How do you know we’re interested in each other anyway?” Benny wondered.

“I’ve heard about your…” Sam paused, searching for the word, “ _ _duel__  during the hunt.”

Benny smiled in embarrassment. While Dean said it was okay, he still couldn’t believe he lost his temper like that. Indeed, what a childish behavior as John described it.

Speaking of the devil, Benny looked at the opposite side of the kitchen and saw John ending his conversation with Ellen, heading toward him and Sam.

“I wish I could witness that snowball fight,” Sam added.

“At least you got to kill the deer,” John pointed out, stopping next to his son. He put an arm around Sam’s shoulders and pulled him close, squeezing his arm with a hand. “I’ve watched the footage. That was a tricky shot, so you should be proud of yourself. I know I am,” he finished with a pleased smile.

Sam suddenly got very flustered.

“Uh… I got lucky,” he dismissed.

“So modest.” John chuckled and looked at Benny. “You’d think fame would go to his head, but no. Sam always loved to downplay his achievements and praise the hell out of Dean’s, but they’re both the best pups I could ask for.”

“Okay, that’s enough,” Sam whined childishly, shrugging his father’s arm off.

John shook his head laughing, turning toward Benny properly. “Actually, I wanted to talk to you about your snowball fight with Dean,” he explained. “The footage was __hilarious__. I haven’t discussed it yet with Ellen, but… I think the show could use your presence.”

Benny’s heart sank in his chest the moment the words registered. Immediately he recalled what Dean said about John offering Jessica a position as PR agent in order to keep Sam tied close to the show.

He glanced at Sam who looked as if John just slapped him.

“Are you fucking kidding me?!” Sam roared.

On the opposite side of the dining table Ellen and few crew members – the only people still remaining in the kitchen – snapped their heads up and stared at them in worry.

“Is there a problem?” Ellen asked.

“No, it’s nothing,” John assured, trying to brighten the nervous atmosphere with a smile.

After several tense seconds of watching them to confirm no fight will break out, Ellen turned back to the crew members and resumed their conversation. That was John’s cue to glare at his son who clenched his teeth and was breathing heavily, clearly on the verge of snapping again. The air was thick with a stench of burning coal and Benny couldn’t smell Sam’s natural scent anymore.

“Don’t behave like that in front a guest,” John chided Sam. “As I said,” he added, addressing Benny again, “it’s just an idea. Think about it, alright? You would fit in on our show, Ben.”

With one last warning glare at Sam, John turned around and joined Ellen across the kitchen.

“I don’t believe this…” Sam spat and stormed out of the kitchen.

Benny leaned against a counter, not even registering what anyone was saying. He stared at John Winchester who was smiling and joking around. There was no sympathy in Benny’s heart right now, only righteous anger. He was seething. Apparently, to John, Benny and his attraction to Dean were little more than pawns in his messed up fantasy that he’d concocted to keep his sons from leaving the show, to keep them from starting their own lives.

What a manipulative __scumbag__.

 

***

 

At last came the day Dean was most looking forward to, the day they were going to film the dinner scene. Okay, so Dean might be a bit of a gourmand, no reason to make a big deal out of it, but who wouldn’t want to try those delicious specialties his dad cooked out of the deer meat? Not to mention, the pumpkin pie and Christmas pudding they threw together at the last moment.

Every last inch of the dinner table was covered by jugs, bowls, plates and tiny decorations the crew members managed to squeeze in. The table looked like it would snap in half any second under the sheer weight. That white, decorative tablecloth certainly wouldn’t survive the dinner, though. Too many people maneuvering the food and drinks over it for things to end without a few accidents. Dean suspected that the crew had prepared several replicas just in case. They had to make the table as pleasing as possible to the future viewers.

Regardless, the set was spotless and inviting.

“For now the food is fake, so don’t try to bite it by accident,” Ellen warned as she led them inside. “We won’t bring the real one until you actually start to eat, because shooting the beginning portion might take a while and reheating the dinner over and over again would ruin the taste. Take a seat. We’re filming in ten minutes.”

Dad, Benny, Becky and Rufus headed to their prearranged seats. Dean held Jessica back though, looking at Sam who stomped toward his own place, a faint stench of burning coal and sour milk trailing after him just like it had the whole morning. Dean tried to find out what was going on during breakfast, but Sam shrugged off all of his questions with a shake of a head.

“What’s going on with him?” Dean murmured, nodding at Sam.

“I don’t know,” Jess admitted. “He’s been like that since last evening, but wouldn’t tell me anything.”

Dad also noticed Sam’s mood and tried to ignore it, focusing on filming instead. However, his stiffer than usual posture betrayed his annoyance. When Dad took the head seat next to Sam’s, he didn’t even spare a glance toward his son. __Goddamned__ , were they arguing again?

Normally he, or recently Jess, would bring them together to have a conversation and restore the peace, but with the contestants and the crew members wandering around, ready to start filming, there was no chance for that. They’d have to resolve their animosities later. Right now they had a scene to shoot.

Dean sat down to the right of Dad’s place at the head of the table and opposite of Sam. He tried to catch Sam’s eyes, but his brother stubbornly stared at the plate in front of him.

“We’re all ready,” Ellen announced. “John, we’ll start with you…. Clear the set!”

The crew members whisked themselves away to hide in corners or behind the cameras.

“Roll sound… Aaaand, action!” the director yelled, leaning forward in his own seat to stare at the monitors in front of him.

On cue Dad moved his eyes over everyone gathered at the table, smiling warmly. Thankfully, Sam raised his head up, but still seemed a second away from starting a fight. Even Becky and Rufus noticed that something was off, and started fidgeting nervously in their seats. Benny either wasn’t aware or kept his cool better than the rest.

“Before we dig in, I’d like to thank you three for coming here,” Dad addressed the contestants. “Over the past five days I got to know you a little better and I must say, I grew to like each of you.” Benny’s lips formed into a tight line and he looked away. Dean figured he was annoyed by something, though he couldn’t smell his scent to confirm it. “I’m honored, and I’m sure my sons are as well, to have such dedicated fans. Hopefully, this won’t be the last time we meet. And for now,” he stood up and glanced at the fake deer meat, and a large knife lying next to it, “let me serve the Christmas dinner. Sam, hand me the knife.”

“It’s right in front of you. Grab it yourself” Sam barked.

Complete silence spread around the table and among the crew members, few shocked stares were exchanged. Dean willed his dad to ignore Sam’s comment. But his dad can’t read minds.

The older Alpha clenched his teeth and gave an apologetic smile to the contestants. “Forgive my son,” he said. “It seems he wants to throw a tantrum today.”

“Don’t talk about me like I’m a pup!” Sam growled.

“Then stop acting like one!” John snapped, jerking his head toward the younger man.

Sam snorted. “Or else what? You’re going to __fire__  me from the show?”

Dean closed his eyes and furiously rubbed his face with both palms, feeling a frustration itching under his skin. __Fuck__ , they were seriously going at it and once they started, there was no chance of calming them down. They could go for __hours__  and everyone would see it.

Clearly, Ellen had the same thought. Dean dropped his hands to look at her as she offered, “Maybe we should leave you alone…” waving awkwardly at the crew members to vacate the place.

Any gratitude Dean felt for her was squashed flat by his dad’s words: “No, stay. I see no reason why you should leave just because Sam doesn’t know how to behave. If __anyone__  should leave, it’s him.”

“Oh, __I’m__  the one with attitude problems?!” Sam sneered. “I guess I’m also the one who __loves__  to order everyone around?”

 “I’m your __father,__ ” Dad growled, leaning over the table, nearly into Sam’s face, “and the __Alpha__  of this family, so __I__  make the rules around the house and you are going to obey them!”

“Again, what will you do if I __don’t__?”

From the next seat over Jess kept rubbing Sam’s arm and murmuring gentle words to calm him down, but he was oblivious to her efforts. Sam __never__  ignored his mate’s presence and, like any Alpha, was very protective of her, which showed just how quickly the argument was spiraling out of control.

Seeing no other options, Dean stood up and waved at Sam. “Come on, Sam, let’s go for a walk and clear out heads.”

Sam gave in unimpressed glare. “How about dad tells you first what he did? I seriously doubt you’ll be so calm if you knew.”

“We can talk about it later” Dean groused.

“In private,” Dad added.

For a moment it almost seemed like Sam was going to listen to Dean. Unfortunately, that short comment from their father snapped him back into a foul mood.

“Why _ _?__ ” he growled. “Why won’t you share with everyone what you’re doing? Are you __ashamed__?” His dad flinched back as if Sam slapped him across the face. He glanced toward the contestants, then the crew members who were slowly inching toward the living room door. “Are you saying there something __wrong__  in what you’re doing?”

Ellen, Becky and Rufus fixed their eyes on the family’s head Alpha, too shocked by the implications to feel any more embarrassment being caught in family argument. Dean stood awkwardly, knowing that it was a lost cause. They won’t stop. They had full intention of going through with this fight regardless of what he or Jess did. If only Dad had kept his mouth shut…

Strangely enough, Benny made no attempt to leave the dining room like the crew members, nor did he stare at Dad like the other three. He had his head turned away, staring at some point in the space, passively listening.

“Fine, so you won’t share with the class,” Sam eventually commented, breaking the tense silence. “Then maybe __Benny__  will tell you, Dean, what Dad did.”

The quiet Alpha closed his eyes and after a deep breath turned to Dean, staring at him apologetically.

“Didn’t want to worry you,” Benny explained, “that’s why I didn’t say anything before. But John,” the name appeared to sting him on his tongue, “offered me a spot on the show.”

Benny’s reaction didn’t go unnoticed by Sam who sighed. “Okay, so you told him everything…” he said to his older brother.

But Dean didn’t listen to him, instead he stared daggers at Dad, waiting for him to deny Benny’s words, to explain himself, fucking __anything__  that would calm Dean’s thudding heart. He was met with a complete silence… because it was all __true__. Once again his dad decided to meddle with their lives – like when he forced Sam to abandon his plans to study at Stanford, or when he manipulated Jess, or any other __fucking__  occasion they wanted to break free from his control!

Heat exploded inside Dean, rippling through his body like a torrent of lava. Despite the fire raging inside, ice bled into the omega’s words when he spoke: “You had no right…”

Instead of showing any remorse or shame for his actions, Dad stared straight into Dean’s eyes. “It’s true.” The uncontrollable inferno blazing in Dean’s body was ready erupt. “All I did was generously give a dedicated fan an opportunity to join our show. Is that a crime?”

That was it. How could Dad sit there and pretend he’d done nothing wrong? Dean exploded. “You conniving __fucking ASSHOLE!__  You’re trying to manipulate me so I won’t leave the show, just like you did with Sam when you made Jess the PR manager! As soon as I told you about my relationship with Benny you started scheming!

“You’re out of your mind,” John said, remaining calm, which worked at Dean like a red cape to a bull.

“Stop playing innocent, dad! This has got to stop! You’re messing with our __lives__!”

“I’m not messing with your lives, Dean. I’m only looking out for what’s best for the show. Unlike you two! You only twiddle your thumbs and complain like the ungrateful brats you are!”

“Maybe we wouldn’t complain all the time if we weren’t chained to it!” Sam shouted.

That was the final straw, Dad lost control like Dean and Sam. “How dare you speak to me like that!” he scream, spitting saliva around, his face turned scarlet red. “I took care of you since you were pups. Worked my _ _ass__  off, always coming home __half-dead__ _ _,__  to keep you fed! All I do is struggle to keep this family together and you’re only turning your back on it!”

“Oh, we’re turning on our back on the family, huh?!” Dean snapped. “You didn’t have a problem with that when we refused to speak with Mom’s parents, because they hate you! Or is it only okay to turn on the family when __you__  say it is?!”

Dad blinked in shock, briefly losing his steam. Neither of the Winchester boys brought up in a while the subject of their grandparents nor the elderly couple’s attempt at rebuilding a relationship with them after they returned to the country years ago. Yes, Dad demanded Dean and Sam to ignore the request, but it was a small sacrifice to make. Still, Dean sometimes felt a tinge of regret that Dad and Mom’s parents refused to forgive each other. It meant that he and Sam won’t get to know their cousins.

In the heat of the moment they had all forgotten about everyone’s presence. Ellen, Becky and Rufus were all glued to their spots, pure shock visible on their faces. Jess slumped down in her chair and Benny had his eyes closed. The only people who still moved around were two cameramen who kept filming the whole argument. That finally caught Dad’s attention.

“Turn that fucking shit off!” he exploded, lunging forward and __hitting__  one of the pieces of equipment, pushing it away. The two men stepped out of his reach, but obediently stopped recording, their back and shoulders hunched to make themselves look smaller and less like a threat, a survival tactic used to lower the chances of being attacked by an enraged Alpha. Dean saw the remaining crew members take similar poses. It must been a huge shock for them to see a normally jovial John Winchester in such carnal state, his teeth clenched, saliva covering his lips.

They seriously should take it somewhere else instead of scaring those poor people to death, but Dean was past caring anymore. He wanted this to be __over__  and if it happened like that, __so be it__.

Dad turned back to Dean and Sam, snarling in rage. “You should show some gratitude!” he shouted. “I made you into stars!”

“We __told__  you we __don’t care__ about that!” Dean reminded. “So many times, I lost count!”

“Then how about you two __man up__  and just __leave__  instead of whining! You don’t seem that determined to leave to me! Wealth is too convenient to abandon, isn’t it?”

Sam snapped and closed the distance between them. Briefly Dean’s heart jumped, afraid that Sam would hit their dad, but he stopped right in front of his face.

“Is that what you want? For us to leave?” he spat, icily. “Then let me make it __very__  clear: I __hate__  this show. I’ve hated it for a long time. And I want __out__! I want a normal life and I want a family of my __own__. I want a life where people don’t hassle me everywhere I go. A life where deranged __bastards__  won’t harass my mate! I want a quiet, normal life. Was that __clear__  enough for you?”

Sam’s heavy breathing was the only thing disrupting the silence that filled the room. Dean saw Ellen cover her mouth and shake her head in disbelief. She didn’t know, he and Sam hid the truth well from everyone.

“Jesus, John…” she managed before her voice failed her.

The Alpha ignored her, completely focused on Sam. Slowly he took a step backwards, nodding calmly, much to Dean’s dismay. Dad’s anger seemed to leave him. He looked… resigned.

“You want out?” Dad repeated. “Okay.” He pointed towards the living room, the front door barely visible. “There’s the door. Don’t bother coming back.” A chilly feeling appeared in Dean’s gut as if someone dropped a block of ice in the pit of his stomach. No, no, no. This was going too far.

Dad scanned the crowd gathered around him, confirming that everyone was still watching in shock. Now that the anger evaporated from Dean’s mind, he clearly sensed a strong mixture of burning coal and salt; the smell of distaste was coming from the crew members and Rufus. “I want all of you out of my house!” Dad shouted causing everyone to flinch.

“John, please… don’t do this,” Jess begged, tears shining in her eyes. “They don’t want to abandon you, they just want to lead their own lives. Why can’t you let them go?”

Her words fell on a deaf ears, because Dad stormed out of the living room. His heavy footsteps echoed down the hallway, before the back door opened and __slammed__  shut. The walls and pictures shook from the force.

Crap. This went horribly wrong.

One look at Sam confirmed that he shared Dean’s panic. They wanted out, but __not__  at the price of losing their father.

Before a conscious thought spawned in his mind, Dean rushed around the dining table and out of the living room, down the hallway, Sam following right behind him. Through the glass in back door he saw only a portion of the back deck, snowflakes falling from the sky and forming snowdrifts. The older alpha was nowhere in sight. A quick glance toward the other end of the house confirmed that his jacket and a scarf were still hanging on the rack.

As it turned out, Jess left the living room as well, but Sam stopped halfway through the hallway and prevented her from going any further. “Stay here?” he asked her gently, barely holding back the panic in his voice. “We’ll talk to him.”

She nodded weakly and remained in the spot while Sam grabbed their jackets, handing Dean his and joining him at the door. They quickly dressed and walked outside. A cold wind rushed to envelop them in an icy embrace as they stepped onto the deck. Dean searched his surroundings. A small burst of relief shot through his heart when he spotted his dad in the distance, sitting on a fallen log near the forest with his back turned to them, shivering from low temperature. Without even waiting for Dean, Sam descended the short stairs and headed toward the older Alpha, a spare jacket and a scarf clutched in his hands. Quickly, Dean followed after him.

This was __bad__. Things never went so far during their fights that Dad attempted to throw them out of the house. Then again, they’d never aired their family problems in front of other people. Dean and Sam had to find a way to calm him down.

Dad heard the snow crunching under their boots as they got closer. Without turning to face them he spat: “I thought you wanted to leave!” White steam blew through the air. He wrapped his arms around his chest and shivered, a simple sweater being his only protection from the sheer cold.

Dean and Sam faltered at the harsh comment, but after a brief hesitation Sam stepped closer to their father, passing him the winter garb. “Come on, put this on or you’ll freeze to death.”

At first the only response he got was a stubborn silence as his dad kept his eyes fixed on the forest behind the house.

Finally Dad caved, reluctantly reaching out with a shaking hand and accepted the clothes, quickly wrapping the scarf around his neck and slipping the jacket on. He refused to look at either of them the whole time. Once he was safely covered, he crammed hands into the pockets and continued staring ahead, although Dean suspected he didn’t really see the trees, too overtaken by emotions and their presence.

There was some free space on the fallen log to Dad’s left and right, both sides covered in a layer of snow; only the spot directly under him was cleaned off. But it was probably getting wet due to his body heat. If they stayed there much longer, he seriously might get sick. Unfortunately, it didn’t appear they’d return fast to the warmth of the house.

Sighing softly, a puff of white air coming from his mouth to evaporate in front of his face, Dean swept the snow from his dad’s right. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Sam repeat the same motion. The snow bit at his bare palm and once he was done he brushed his hand against his jacket to heat it up. He sat down with a heavy heart.

Snowflakes kept falling from the sky on their shoulders and exposed heads. The chilly weather mirrored the cold sensation in Dean’s chest and stomach. The thought that they wouldn’t be able to talk their dad out of this, won’t be able to breach the chasm that grew between them over the years, was terrifying. If they had to choose between their dad and leaving to live their own lives… Honestly, Dean didn’t know what he’d do. Sam clearly reached his breaking point and he himself was getting there. One day he might lose his temper too and say things that would cause irreversible damage to his relationship with his dad.

This entire situation was so fucked up. But he would be __damned__  if he gave up so easily on his family.

“Dad, we don’t want to abandon you,” he assured.

“I said that you can go,” their dad growled, ignoring his words.

“Not like this. I want to start my own life so much it __hurts__ , but I want you to be a part of it. I want my future pups to meet their grandpa,” he said gently.

Dad’s eyes fluttered shut for a moment, a flash of emotions gracing his face. When he opened them again, the anger was back. “You were __excited__  to join the show, __proud__  to be a part of something I created… and now you’re telling me that you hate it.”

Yes, they’d been excited. Dean was only fourteen and Sam ten. At first they were only supposed to provide cutesy scenes for the viewers to gush over. But they loved the opportunity to spend more time with their dad. Usually, they saw him only for half an hour each day whenever he stumbled in from work. He ate quickly a dinner Dean threw together with the limited knowledge of cooking and passed out on a couch. Sometimes he’d lay down in bed if he had enough strength left to make it there. He would sleep for a couple of hours before he was forced to leave for his second job. When the show was picked up, the boys had been excited. They would get to hang with their dad more! Plus, the idea of travelling the world sounded amazing. The show brought them together as a family.

Now it separated them.

“It’s been fourteen years,” Sam pointed out. “Things changed. __We__  changed. We want different things from life than when we were pups.”

“This has __nothing__  to do with you or your failure as a father,” Dean added.

Dad snapped his head to the right and glared at him furiously. “I did my best in that situation! I haven’t failed anything!”

That comment brought back a faint memory that refused to vanish from Dean’s mind, a memory of Mom’s parents visiting them at a motel they stayed in after a house fire changed their live forever. He remembers the harsh words aimed at his dad about how he __failed__  to protect their mom and how he was unfit to take care of his pups. Words Dean always saw in Dad’s eyes whenever he asked them if they were happy while they were thousands of miles away from their country.

“They can’t take us from you anymore, Dad,” Dean reassured. John blinked in surprise. “You don’t have to cling so desperately to us. __Nothing__  will tear us apart. We’re family.”

Behind Dad he noticed Sam looking down sheepishly.

“I’m starting to hate you, Dad,” Sam murmured shamefully, voice quiet like one of a child confessing to a horrible crime; the older men immediately turned to him, “and I’m __so scared__  that one day that’ll be all I feel toward you.”

Dean couldn’t believe his ears. Sam __never__  mentioned anything about this despite the fact they were always honest with each other, apparently hiding it out of shame.

But that was what finally broke the dam. Dad covered his face with both hands and a choked sob came from his mouth. The realization of how deeply he wronged his sons was cutting into him. Horrified at his dad’s pain, Dean grabbed onto his shoulder in a futile gesture to sooth some pain and felt it shudder to the rhythm of the older man’s sobs, his own eyes filled with unshed tears. He didn’t know what else to do. This big, strong and brave Alpha who always stood up for them, who always protected them and took care of them shouldn’t be utterly broken like this. For the first time in years Dean felt like a lost pup.

“I’m sorry…” Dad sobbed. “I’m sorry…”

He wept, tears streaming down his cheeks and dropping from his chin onto the snow below. And they just kept coming and coming like a poison had been gathering inside his body for two decades, filling his heart with never-ending fear of losing his pups. The smell of his anguish managed to overpower the scent of snow. Dean covered his nose, unable to feel it any longer.

Slowly Dad calmed down, breath evening out and tears drying up. When he weakly let his hands fall, Dean saw how red and puffy his eyes were. He looked like he aged ten years over past fifteen minutes.

“I’m so sorry…” he repeated. “They… they told me I’d never see you again and I didn’t know what to do… I’m sorry for ruining your lives…”

“You didn’t ruin __anything,__ ” Dean assured quickly, gently brushing his hand across his dad’s shoulder. Fuck, his throat was sore and barely worked when he spoke.

“We __don’t__  regret being raised by you,” Sam added. “It’s just… it’s time for us to have our own lives.”

Dad warily glanced over their faces as if not believing what he was hearing. When he spotted no proof of them lying, he visibly relaxed, tension disappearing from his entire body. He reached out, put his arms around his sons’ shoulders and brought them closer, hugging each softly. Dean closed his eyes, inhaling a calming scent of their Alpha father just like he did when he was a pup.

“You can leave,” he said. “I won’t be stopping you anymore.”

This was Dean’s dream come true… and yet anguish awoke in his heart at the realization that they wouldn’t live together any longer. Soon he and Sam would move out away from their dad. Dean knows they’d meet often, but it won’t be the same. Funny. He was expecting to feel happier than he was. The happiness was there, but it was tinged by sadness.

No matter what, though, they would remain a family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm very proud of how this chapter turned out. My only regret is that Benny does pretty much nothing throughout despite being the facto main character. Still, hope you enjoyed it! On Friday will come the final chapter!


	7. Goodbye For Now

The final day of filming came and went.

Despite the argument that broke between them and the harsh words they said, letting years of built up grievances to burst free, the Winchesters insisted the Christmas Special should be completed. Benny saw uneasiness on everyone’s faces. They expected them to __continue__? After the brutal truths they’d learned a mere half hour earlier? The truth that forever altered their perception of the show? People anxiously stood around the room exchanging concerned looks and silently asking for advice what to do. None of the three contestants moved, waiting for the crew members’ decision.

Benny tried to judge, based on Dean’s behavior, how the situation unfolded outside – if the Winchesters made up and reached some sort of agreement or if the family was just torn apart. But the Omega’s expression and posture remained impassive, giving out no clues. Smelling emotions from his scent also proved futile as it was lost in the mixture of confusion and shock that permeated the air ever since the fight broke out.

Eventually Ellen stepped in, clasped her hands together to gather crew’s attention and ordered them to get back on track, because they still had a work left to do. One by one people started moving, slowly and confused, like they just awoke from a deep slumber. Pamela and Madison stepped out to reapply make-up to the Winchester men’s faces, also checking to make sure nobody else needed a fix before they returned behind the camera. When Dean, Sam and John took their places again, the director looked at Ellen to confirm that yes, they were really doing it. Once he got a reassuring nod, he ordered the cameras and sound to start rolling again.

There was a noticeable shift in mood and everyone’s behavior, particularly John’s, who lost his energetic demeanor of a host determined to make his guests’ stay as pleasant as possible. Instead he looked worn and weary. The bright smile he always wore grew strained. Benny saw how red and swollen his eyes were, giving a hint of the emotional conversation that happened outside, before Pamela skillfully covered those imperfection in a thick layer of make-up. Similarly, John’s sons acted more listless. The moment Sam sat down, Jessica drew closer and put her hand on his in a comforting gesture, keeping it there for most of the dinner scene. Neither commented on the situation, having the ability to console one another with no need for words.

Every now and then Benny would glance toward Dean, ready to give him a similar comfort if the Omega needed it. But for the first time in two days Dean didn’t seek out his company nor attempt to speak to him. He _ _didn’t want__ Benny’s help and preferred to deal with family issues on his own. Though it hurt, Benny understood.

Over time the atmosphere loosened up when people realized that the Winchesters were fine and not just putting on a good face for the cameras. Jessica started the conversations by praising John for the delicious deer stew, followed by Rufus and Dean making similar compliments. Soon chit-chat broke around the table and the air filled with laid back, happy scents, making Benny relax in his seat. His mood improved further when he heard rumor spreading among the crew members that Dean and Sam would be leaving the show after the New Year with their father’s blessing. Although Dean wasn’t paying attention to him, the situation in the Winchesters’ household was clearly improving and that’s what counted.

 

***

 

The next morning Benny woke up rested, but not in a particularly optimistic mood. It was the last few hours of his stay in the cottage and he __dreaded__ leaving. Though he and Dean had talked about the potential of something __more__  than friendship with one another, they hadn’t gotten much farther before shit hit the fan. Benny wasn’t sure how to even broach the conversation after something like last night happened.

Dean had hardly even __acknowledged__  his presence the day before. But Benny was anything if not patient. He suspected that right now Dean wouldn’t be in a mindset to contemplate a potential relationship. And the Alpha was okay with that. He would wait as long as Dean wanted.

__Relationship._ _

Jesus, to think they actually got close enough that it was a real possibility, not just Benny’s fantasy he’d dreamed of during lonely nights to sooth his aching heart. Oh, how things could change within the span of five days! He didn’t ache nor did he feel empty. The only part that cast a shadow over him was the uncertainty of whether Dean would still be interested in meeting up later. The uncertainty throbbed at the back of his mind like a tumor, constantly growing. Maybe Dean gave it another thought and decided that Benny wasn’t worth the trouble after all, considering how his relationship with Andrea progressed? __No, Dean isn’t like that__ , he reminded himself. He hoped.

Benny threw his covers aside and sat on the edge of the bed, rubbing palms over his face. There was no use in wrestling with these thoughts. Best to just get up and face the day.

He stood up and made the bed, despite knowing that somebody will take the bedding off and wash it later anyway; he didn’t want to leave a mess behind. He dressed, used the bathroom, and then ventured downstairs to the kitchen where, as usual, Sam and Jessica were already preparing breakfast. Today they were quiet and only occasionally broke the silence to whisper something to each other. Both were in better moods than Benny had seen them in the day before.

Dean didn’t look up from his plate when Benny came in. He tried to silence the wrenching in his heart. After he made his plate he decided to be bold and sat across from Dean. The Omega side eyed him but never met his eyes. Benny was able to tamp down the sadness in his chest, arguing that Dean was most likely embarrassed about the prior evening’s events and wanted to eat his breakfast in silence. So, Benny made himself comfortable, tucking into his own breakfast without a word.

As he ate the scrambled eggs and watched others join in, he realized that he’d miss this little ritual they developed, this sensation of __belonging__ , even if it was only for a week. Was __this__ what family felt like? The idea of returning to his empty hut where he’d spend time completely by himself filled him with regret. He wished to remain here longer, but that was a ridiculous thought. He wasn’t a part of this family and it wasn’t his place to stay.

Maybe he’d invite Lenore for a dinner after he gets home? Surely she’d be curious to hear all the details about the filming and his interactions with the Winchesters. During those five days he only managed to send her a couple short texts due to being preoccupied spending time with Dean and too embarrassed by the squabble he’d instigated with her because he couldn’t control his stupid __A__ _ _lpha__  behavior.

The chatter that buzzed inside the kitchen cut off suddenly as everyone looked towards the entryway, the tangy scent of unease spreading in the air. Benny followed their eyes to see John standing in the threshold, twitching uncomfortably under the scrutiny. Unlike his sons and Jessica, he still looked tired like he hadn’t slept most of the night. It __squeezed__ Benny’s heart. The resentment he felt toward the older Alpha vanished when he learned about John’s decision to finally let his sons leave the show. Now he saw John for what he really was: a man who was traumatized by his mate’s death and who had never properly dealt with it due to his in-laws attempting to take away what little of family he had left. Which turned him into a clingy, paranoid Alpha he wouldn’t have been otherwise.

He decided to reach out to John, breaking the awkward silence: “Good morning, John.”

The older Alpha jerked his head toward him and blinked in surprise, not expecting such friendly treatment. “Good morning, Ben,” he responded, then looked around the kitchen. “And everybody.”

From across the table Dean finally looked at the Alpha and flashed Benny a grateful smile. Dean turned back to John, patting the chair next to his. “Come on, Dad, don’t just stand there. Your breakfast won’t eat itself,” the Omega added.

Slowly John collected the last serving Jessica left on the counter and took a seat next to his oldest son. The conversation started again, taking attention away from John, and the rest of their final meal together progressed without problems.

Afterwards the three contestants returned upstairs to get ready for their journeys home. Since he hadn’t brought much along, Benny managed to pack in fifteen minutes. Before leaving, he scanned the room for the last time, partially to ensure he didn’t forget anything, partially to remember every detail. Funny how one can become attached to a place in the span of only few days. Finally, he stepped out into the hallway and closed the door behind him with a soft __click__.

Each step downstairs increased the uncertainty in his mind. Would Dean want to speak with him or would he barely acknowledge his presence like he did yesterday, quietly turning Benny down? Maybe he really lost interest after all?

A small gathering stood by the front door. Becky and Rufus were putting their winter clothes on, two travel bags resting full and zipped on the floor. The Winchester stood close by. The air was thick with various smells and emotions, mostly happiness but with a hint of regret. Clearly, Benny wasn’t the only one saddened to be leaving already.

As he walked down the last few steps, Dean glanced in his direction, but then the Omega turned back to the other two contestants without offering a single word or smile. So it was true. Dean __did__ change his mind and couldn’t wait to be rid of Benny.

“Hope you two enjoyed your stay,” John expressed, addressing Becky and Rufus. After a second he continued shamefully: “Despite everything that happened.”

Rufus straightened up once he slipped the jacket on and took a serious look at John. He was the one most thrilled about meeting the Alpha, so witnessing his idol’s troubled side must have shook him to the core. For a moment Benny was worried that Rufus would react badly to that comment, but ultimately a faint smile brightened his face.

“Not what I expected,” he admitted, shrugging his shoulders. “That old geezer, Bobby, will __never__ let me forget about that embarrassing hunt.” He flashed teeth in a wide grin and John chuckled with a clear relief. Dean, Sam and Jessica offered amused smiles. “I hope you’re all going to work things out,” Rufus added more seriously.

“We already are,” Sam assured.

Benny walked over to them and everyone looked in his direction. He dropped the heavy travel bag on the ground at Dean and Sam’s feet. “So, you really are leaving the show?” Disappointment squeezed his heart. Not only was Dean not interested in pursuing a relationship with him after all – __idiot__ , __what else did you expect?__  – now he wouldn’t be able to see the Omega on TV.

“Yes, it’s settled,” John confirmed. His voice sounded stern and natural scent remained calm, but a glimmer of pain in his eyes betrayed John’s true feelings. “We’ll make a public announcement after the New Year.”

Benny nodded and briefly pondered what the big change in the Winchester family would mean for the “ _ _Alpha vs. Wilderness__ ” show, especially considering the situation that it put them through. Word about what happened during the filming of the Christmas special would surely get out. Those things __always__ become public knowledge somehow. All it took was for one of the crew members to share the information with his own relatives and the gossip will spiral out of control. Would the ratings plummet - due to either the rumors or Dean and Sam’s departure - and lead to the show’s cancellation? Hard to predict. The public sometimes allowed worse things to pass through while other times, they destroyed people’s careers over smaller misdeeds. However, as Benny stared at John’s determined expression, he understood that whatever the future held, the older Alpha would see it through. For his sons’ sake.

Strangely enough, John’s words caused Becky to start fidgeting and her scent grew thicker with nervousness. Was she distraught over Sam’s departure from the show?

But when she turned to Sam and Jessica to speak up, she said: “Before we leave, I’d like to apologize for my behavior.”

“It’s okay,” Jessica assured.

“No, it’s not! I wanted to grab Sam’s attention so much that I never considered how you might feel about it and that was wrong.” Becky bit her lower lip and hesitated briefly. “For the record, I don’t approve of the abuse you get, Jess. You have the right to be mated to anyone you want.”

Sam gave Becky a faint smile, which greatly contrasted with the forced friendliness he showed her previously.

“Thank you,” Jessica said. “And don’t worry, I’m not angry at you.”

In the end her claim that Becky wasn’t malicious, but was just excited to meet Sam, turned out to be true. That thought caused Benny to feel a bit guilty about avoiding Becky for the past week. Still, he doubted they’d get along anyway. Her overly energetic behavior clashed too much with his calmer personality.

Rufus and Becky zipped their jackets and pulled on their woolen caps. Becky was barely visible from under all the thick clothes she wore. John opened the front door for them and the chilly wind rushed inside, easily seeping through Benny’s jumper. Before the house stood a navy 2015 Mercedes-Benz, whose good appearance was somewhat diminished by the muddy slush caking its sides. Next to it a middle-aged man paced in place to stay warm. When he noticed the door being open, he walked closer and stopped in place, waiting for his passengers.

“Take care of yourself,” Rufus threw over his shoulder as he stomped outside, the travel bag hanging from his hand.

“Goodbye,” Becky added, giving a wincing smile. She struggled to carry her own stuff - and she brought a __lot__ of it, the bag seemed like it would burst any second - so the driver hurried to take them away.

When both contestants were safely tucked on the backseats and the car moved toward the gate, cutting through piles of snow, John closed the door. A moment later the intercom buzzed and the Alpha pushed a button to let the car out.

And so Benny remained alone with the Winchesters. He moved his eyes over each of their friendly faces; he was never particularly good in saying goodbye or expressing his emotions in general. He reached Dean and stopped there, having so much to say to the beautiful Omega who gave him so many good memories yet completely lost for words.

“Could you guys give us a minute alone?” Dean asked his family.

Benny’s heart fluttered in excitement, but he immediately chastised himself. __Don’t get your hopes up, Lafitte. He simply doesn’t want to humiliate you in front of everyone after he convinced them you were worth pursuing. He treats you better than you deserve.__ He swallowed through his swollen throat. Yeah, that sounded like a more realistic option. Why the hell would Dean change his mind about dating Alphas for someone like __him__?

“Sure,” Sam responded to his brother’s request, putting arm around Jessica’s waist and guiding her toward the back of the house. On his way he patted Benny on a shoulder. “It was nice to meet you. Sorry we didn’t get to hang together more.”

Benny smiled back. “Don’t worry about it,” he said. “And it was nice meeting you too.”

“Bye,” Jessica said. “Drive carefully.”

“Take care, Ben,” John added.

They all ventured down the hallway and disappeared inside the game room, shutting the door behind them.

For nearly a minute neither Benny nor Dean spoke. Dean opened his mouth, but didn’t utter a word and closed it again with a chuckle. He rubbed his palm over the back of his neck in what Benny grew to recognize as a sign of nervousness. Although he never spotted it on the show, during his stay in the Winchester house he saw Dean doing it numerous times, always in his presence. That didn’t mean anything though. He was most likely embarrassed that he got Benny’s hopes up to begin with and put himself in the position where he had to turn him down.

Dean walked into the living room, still silent, and Benny leaned against the doorframe. The hard wood provided a sensation of stability and reassurance he needed to get through this.

The floorboards thudded as Dean wandered back and forth. Each of his steps caused Benny’s chest to squeeze tighter and tighter at what was coming. _ _Please, just do it quickly, so I won’t have to stand here like an idiot. I could drive away as fast as possible, pretend I never was stupid enough to believe I had a chance with such amazing Omega.__  But the seconds passed in silence, even though Dean stopped walking and turned to face Benny. His expression showed uncertainty on how to proceed with what had to be done and his smell only stressed it further, giving a faint scent of oil.

Finally, Dean opened his mouth again and this time he spoke: “Guess it’s time to say goodbye, huh?”

Benny’s heart sank. Apparently part of him expectedthat Dean would still be interested and offered to meet up later. However, those words left no doubts of his intentions. __That’s what you get for getting your hopes up, idiot.__

Well, he really __was__ an idiot, because instead of taking a hint and heading out immediately, he nodded and continued the conversation: “What’s going to happen now?” Dean scowled and Benny clarified: “With you and Sam leaving the show?”

“Like Dad said, we’re going hold off with the public announcement ‘til January,” Dean reminded. “Though I doubt it will stay a secret for that long,” he added in sneering tone. Then he sighed and his expression mellowed. “For now we’ll stay here and spend the next three weeks as a family. Dad might act tough, but I know how hard it is for him to let us go and he needs some time to fully accept it.” Dean gave out an apologetic smile. “So, you can see yourself that I won’t have much time to--”

The last sentence hung in the air, unfinished. Dean didn’t have to add another word, Benny understood what he meant. That relationship he __deluded__  himself into believing was a real possibility ended before it even began.

He should’ve left earlier without speaking to Dean. Hadn’t the experience with Andrea taught him __anything__? He had no chance to be happy. He was __broken__.

“Yeah, I get it, brother,” he said, throat tightening, aching. Why was he __still__ here? Just __leave__. Dean probably couldn’t wait for this conversation to be over either.

“Great. Are you free the second week of January?”

Wait, __what?__

“F-for what?” Benny stuttered.

“Our date,” Dean clarified, chuckling as if it was the most obvious answer in the universe.

Benny stood in place, frozen to the spot, and stared at the amused Omega as his mind struggled to process what he’d just heard. Was Dean playing trick on him? “I thought you changed your mind,” he managed. “That you didn’t want me anymore. You’ve heard how my last relationship ended...” His voice trailed off when Dean’s expression soured and his scent slowly turned wet again.

“She really messed with your head, didn’t she?” the Omega asked sadly.

After a moment of mindful silence, Dean walked over to him, bringing that somber smell of damp apple pie closer. Each step he took caused Benny’s heart to raise higher and higher, until he felt like it was stuck in his throat, making it hard for him to catch a breath. Dean __didn’t__ want to break up. In fact, he still intended to meet up and...

How was that __possible__? Things like this didn’t happen in real life, didn’t happen to __Benny__. He was a broken Alpha.

Dean stopped right in front of him and Benny got lost in those beautiful green eyes that reminded him of fresh grass growing in a forest clearing during summer. Not for the first time Benny noticed how similar in size Dean was to him and he thought fleetingly that it was unusual for an Omega to be so tall, almost Alpha-like. But with plush lips that felt wonderful when Benny kissed them two days ago, long eyelashes, and his enticing sweet smell – they were all unmistakable traits of an Omega. Absolutely __perfect__.

Back in November Lenore pointed out that Benny could use the contest as an opportunity to confront his fantasies with reality and confirm if Dean was as great in person as he imagined. The truth was that he wasn’t. He was __better.__  He was __real__.

“Forget what that bitch told you,” Dean said. In the past Benny would snap and defend Andrea’s honor, insist that he was the problem. This time he remained silent. “You’re a great guy and I want to date you. I don’t know if things will work out, but what happened between you and Andrea doesn’t scare me.”

Tension that held Benny in a tight grip eased and his heart dropped down into its proper place, allowing him to take a lungful of air filled with Dean’s apple pie scent.

That vicious whispered at the back of mind sneered continuously that he’ll regret it later and Dean will dump him when he sees Benny’s true side, but it was muffled by the pleasant warmth rushing through his body. He was wanted by this __amazing__ Omega and that’s what mattered.

“The second week of January sounds fine,” Benny decided. “I don’t have any plans.”

“Now you do,” Dean commented with a smirk.

Overwhelmed by the rush of emotions Benny wasn’t able to hold Dean’s gaze and he let his eyes wander around the room while he struggled to regain control. The Christmas tree blinked at him from the corner with a rainbow of colorful lights and his mind latched onto the first thought that popped into it: “Will the crew take the decorations down?”

“Yeah,” Dean confirmed, glancing toward the tree indifferently. “Since we’re done with the filming.”

A relief joined other feelings inside Benny at the thought that those kitschy decorations won’t spoil the old-fashioned look of Winchesters’ cottage for much longer. But then he recalled that Dean enjoyed the new appearance and said: “It’ll be sad to see them go, huh?”

To his confusion Dean squinted like he smelled something putrid.

“Are you serious?” he asked. “You actually like them?”

“I... I thought you did...” Benny admitted.

Dean smirked in understanding, giving him a once over. “So you only __pretended__ to score some brownie points with me?” he figured out and, judging by his demeanor, clearly wasn’t happy about it. Benny swallowed in his suddenly dry throat. Great, they haven’t even gone on their first date and he was already screwing up. And he wasn’t sure what he did wrong either. Andrea __always__ expected him to agree with her regardless of the situation...

Apparently Dean could read from his face or smell, because his expression softened as he realized where Benny was coming from. “Dude, I don’t want you to be my __yes__  man,” he explained. “Forget what Andrea wanted from you.” Easier said than done. She used to be his everything and the pain he felt after their breakup became an inseparable part of his life. His failure defined him for three years. It was subdued whenever he was with Dean, but he would need a longer time to get rid of it completely.

He had to start somewhere, though.

“Those decorations are hideous,” he proclaimed and earned a chuckle from Dean. “But you’ve praised them before. Why did you do that if you don’t like them?”

“Because the viewers enjoy this crap,” Dean clarified, “and you need to constantly keep their expectations in mind when you’re making a show. Personally I don’t care much for ornaments.” He emphasized his point with a shrug. “A simple Christmas tree and stockings over the fireplace is all I need. It’s not the decorations that make Christmas, but family.”

Benny couldn’t hold back the smile - nor wanted to - that fell across his lips over Dean’s honest comment. For all the troubles and pain the Winchesters went through, they stuck together and loved each other deeply. And who knows, maybe in the future Benny would become a part of this family?

He was about to get back to the subject of their date, to work out the details, when he realized where they unknowingly wandered during their conversation.

“It appears that we’re standing under a mistletoe,” the Alpha pointed out.

They looked up in unison to confirm that yeah, the little green thing hanged right above their heads.

“So?” Dean dismissed, staring back at Benny.

“There is a tradition...” the Alpha continued a little flustered.

“Dude, if you want to kiss me, you don’t need stupid excuses. Just go for it.”

That’s not why he... Dammit, he was trying to be __romantic__!

But now there was nothing stopping him from continuing. He ignored the embarrassment and took a step toward Dean, closing the distance between them. The aroma of apple pie was clean again, luscious and filled with anticipation. Slowly Benny enveloped Dean around his waist and the Omega melted into his touch, putting his arms around Benny’s neck, giving up on the unruly behavior so characteristic to his strange omega ways.

Benny stared for a moment into Dean’s eyes, which appeared particularly inviting from under the shadow cast by long eyelashes, then slipped his gaze down the Omega’s face to focus on his plush lips. Silence stretched, this time filled with a different type of tension. When Dean bit his lower lip, it sent a shiver down Benny’s spine and without further delay he lowered his head for a kiss.

Just as the Alpha remembered from two days ago, Dean’s lips were soft and smooth. Benny got completely lost in the sensation, inhaling the apple pie scent that was everywhere, letting his hands brush over the muscled back.

Shyly, he slipped his tongue out and licked across Dean’s lower lip, partially curious if the bite from before left a mark. The Omega moaned against Benny’s mouth and pressed their bodies harder until it felt like they were about to meld together as one. Dean leaned his head to the side for better access and licked back. That clear invitation and willingness to go further awoke Alpha instincts in Benny, spreading carnal desire to __claim__  through his veins. He was just enough in control to realize that he wouldn’t be able to go all the way, mount the Omega and leave a bite at the back of his neck, so instead he pushed with his tongue, gently but insistently, asking Dean for consent. In response Dean parted his lips, letting Benny slip in and explore, slowly dissolving into one another.

They separated several minutes or maybe hours later, gasping for breath. Dean’s sweet taste lingered behind and Benny swallowed. Every fiber of his being __demanded__ that he continue. Unfortunately, he had a long drive ahead of him and Dean made it clear that his family wanted to spend the upcoming weeks alone.

It was okay, though, because they would meet again, get to know each other and build something unforgettable.

“Merry Christmas...” Benny murmured.

Dean grinned. “And a Happy New Year...” he responded.

The pain that haunted Benny for past three years disappeared. Right then he felt only pure, unadulterated happiness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so we reached the end of this fic. I have several follow-ups in mind (the first one should be ready mid-January), so best subscribe to my channel if you're interested, because they'll be posted as seperate works and grouped under a series.
> 
> Much like with my other stories I’d like to share some information about how the story shaped and became what you ended up reading.  
> 1\. The story was inspired by the movie “Christmas in Connecticut” directed by Arnold Schwarzenneger. I watched it as a kid, so I don’t remember anything beyond the basic plot: a park ranger becomes a guest star in Christmas special episode of a popular show.  
> 2\. In the very first draft, Castiel was suppose to be the ranger, but I changed it for Benny as he seemed more fitting in the role.  
> 3\. Originally Andrea’s character was VERY different. Instead of a self-center bitch who abused Benny and dumped him for not meeting her every whim, she was a kind person and genuinely cared for him, but realized that their relationship wasn’t working out. Benny wasn’t able to move on from their break-up and in order to help him with it, she applied in his name for the “Alpha vs. Wilderness” contest. I changed it, because the whole scenario made Benny seem... angsty. I mean seriously, not being able to deal with a normal break-up after three years? That’s a bit much. So I switched things around and replaced Andrea with Lenore in that crucial role.  
> 4\. In contrast to Andrea, John’s character became MORE sympathetic. Originally, he was very much what you’d expect from him in Omegaverse fic: an arrogant Alpha who views Omegas as bellow him and was extremely angry when Dean presented as one. At the end of the story Dean, Sam and Jessica would tell him off and ditch him to start their lives anew without his toxic influence. However, I wanted the fic to be more fluffy, since it’s a Christmas special. I completely re-worked John’s backstory while writing the bit in first chapter where it’s introduced. The idea about a father making his kids work in a business they hate, believing that a family should stay together, came from an episode of “Kitchen Nightmare” (yes, seriously); the scene where the owner’s kids tell him how much they hate being chained to the restaurant and the father is brought to tears, it was very moving. I’m glad that I went in that direction and I think it made for much more effective story.  
> 5\. As a consequence of changes made to John, Dean’s character also received a complete overhaul. Originally, his claim that he doesn’t date Alphas, because their personalities would clash too much, was just an excuse given to the public. In reality, he acted like an Alpha himself as that’s what John expected from him. Also, he didn’t merely believe himself to be pregnant, but actually WAS and the main conflict of the story centered around him hiding it from John, which Sam and Jess helped with. Dean planned, that after the Christmas special was completed, he’d move abroad for several month when his baby bump was impossible to cover up and give up the baby for adoption. Of course, in the end John would find out and explode in rage, thus exposing himself to everyone as abusive asshole instead of a loving father he pretended to be. The pregnancy was a result of a one night stand, which Dean indulged in when he couldn’t repress his natural craving for an Alpha. However, due to changes made to John’s backstory and personality it no longer made sense for Dean to be scared of John flipping out, so this entire płot was modified accordingly.  
> 6\. Because Dean no longer repressed his attraction to Alphas and instead truly didn’t want to date them, the one night stand plot point was scrapped and replaced by his short fling with Castiel.  
> 7\. Delusional pregnancy is a real thing, but the actual term is “false pregnancy” and scientists aren’t sure what causes it. All the information I provided in the story was written that way for drama’s sake and simplicity.  
> 8\. The minor subplot about abuse Jess received for being mated to Sam was inspired by similar things happening to wives of Jared Padalecki and Jensen Ackles. And countless other spouses of famous people. Some fans are seriously messed up.  
> 9\. There was one whole scene I scrapped: Benny would engage in a conversation with Rufus who’d mention gossip about Dean visiting a doctor several weeks earlier as a reminder to the readers. Later I figured that Rufus isn’t the type of person who reads tabloids nor repeats such information to other people, so I toyed with the idea of having someone else bring it up. Sam, Jessica and John were obviously out. It didn’t make sense for Ellen to gossip about such private matter of people she represents and Becky focused exclusively on Sam, so she wouldn’t be in the know. Introducing an extra character for this sole purpose seemed like a waste and the scene was ultimately scrapped.


End file.
